Uninspired Ramblings of Pure Inspiration

RIP Michael Jackson

2009-06-27T09:54:00.000-04:00

As one of the millions (billions?) of Michael Jackson fans, I was very saddened by his passing on June 25, 2009. I grew up listening to his music and experiencing his videos. I have very vivid memories of being 6 years old and seeing the Thriller video for the first time. It scared the crap out of me but I wanted to see it. People were so excited about it, I had to know why. While it was scary, it was also awesome. Unfortunately, I woke up that night screaming for my mom because it gave me nightmares. My mom had to take down my Michael Jackson poster because I was traumatized. It's a really cool thing to think back on.

I wanted to do my own little tribute to the man that revolutionized pop music and music videos. So I'm going to post my top three favorite Michael Jackson songs.

Dirty Diana
This was a grittier side to him and I loved the song. I loved it so much, I would put on his "Bad" album right at the spot where this song began. Enjoy!

In case they disable the embedding at some point, here is the direct link:

Dirty Diana

The Way You Make Me Feel
This was another song that I could cue up on the "Bad" album. It was so cute and playful. I especially liked the video. I couldn't find this in an embedded file so click the link and enjoy the playful side of Michael Jackson.

The Way You Make Me Feel

PYT: Pretty Young Thang
I have an 80's styled sweatshirt with these words on them that I LOVED to wear as a kid. It was pink with purple writing on it and although I'm not a fan of pink, this was one exception. I didn't remember ever seeing a video for this song and I couldn't find one so my memory serves me correctly. Here is the song anyway. Enjoy and dance around!

I hope he was secretly working on an album that will be released posthumously. I would enjoy hearing how his musical ability has grown since his last album. My best wishes go out to his family. He will be missed but his music has immortalized him in the hearts and minds of millions.

The Whys of it all

2009-03-09T09:10:00.002-04:00

Over the past weekend, I was on the go. I had the opportunity to see some improv comedy, which was VERY cool. I also helped with an event called She Remembers. It was an event held in honor of Women's History Month (March) dedicated to HIV/AIDS awareness. The event consisted of a prayer vigil and panel discussion about the effect of HIV/AIDS is having on the black community.

Ever since I was in high school, I have been an advocate for educating people about HIV/AIDS. It started when I was a volunteer with the A.S.K. U.S. program at AID Atlanta. A.S.K. U.S. is the youth based education and outreach program. A.S.K. U.S. stands for Adolescents Seeking Knowledge Understanding Safer Sex. As a junior/senior in high school, I was very active in the A.S.K. U.S. program at AID Atlanta. I joined the program because a good friend of mine did it first and when she told me about it, it sounded very cool. I was (and still am) always looking for cool and different things to get involved with. Well I joined and went through the training and came out with a passion to educate as many people as possible about HIV/AIDS. Not only did I want to educate them about the disease and how to interact with people who have it but I also wanted to educate them about protecting themselves from the contracting the disease.

Over the weekend, I was asked by someone (thanks Jodine Dorce for the introspection!) why I was an advocate/volunteer for HIV/AIDS. I answered her question but later I realized that I never said why. I only explained how I became a volunteer. I have a friend that has told me the why is the most important thing to discover. Once you know the why, you'll truly understand the person. Well here is my Why.

When I was officially introduced to the severity of the HIV/AIDS epidemic, I wasn't very sexually active. I was in high school and trying to figure out who I was as a person and how my sexuality fit into the whole scheme of things. I was dating and having boyfriends so sex was definitely around me. Two of my oldest friends had gotten pregnant at 17 and I knew of several other girls that had babies as well. I was definitely aware of sex but as far as I knew, the biggest ramification was pregnancy. Now that was enough to make me pause because I had absolutely no intention of having any kids while I was still a kid.

Then I learned about HIV/AIDS. I was floored at how this disease that was preventable and not passed through every day contact was spreading so quickly largely because of a lack of education and a stigma. It made very little sense to me how something as simple as using a condom could greatly reduce your chances of contracting this incurable disease but people weren't using them. I was saddened to learn that kids my age were contracting this disease because no one was talking to them about it and they didn't feel comfortable going to their parents. I totally understood and wanted very much to help.

As a part of A.S.K. U.S. we went out and did presentations and educational seminars for kids our age. We would do skits, presentations, demonstrations and question and answer sessions to educate them about safe sex, STD's and HIV/AIDS. We went to churches, community centers and other gatherings of our peers. We were trained how to deal with the questions we may get and how to educate with care. It was awesome. I became much more outgoing and extremely comfortable talking about sensitive subjects like sex, STD's, condoms and everything in between. I met some really cool kids of different backgrounds and socioeconomic statuses. Some of the kids in the program with me were gay, lesbian and bisexual and I learned to accept everyone for their differences and embrace them in spite of them.

It was a great time in my life and I shared it with two of my closest friends and one other classmate of mine. Going through that experience helped make me the person I am today. It also helped create the passion that I have for educating people about HIV/AIDS and safe sex. When I left Atlanta and traveled to Tallahassee for college, I took a big bag full of condoms with me. I created a tin o'pleasure that I kept full of condoms for anyone to stop by my room and use. I encouraged everyone I met to let me know if they needed condoms so I could get them for them.

I also did some volunteer work with Big Bend CARES, which was the HIV/AIDS organization in the Tallahassee area. So now that I'm back in Atlanta, I'm back at AID Atlanta. I've been doing mostly health fairs but now I am seeking other ways to get more involved.

So that is one of my Whys. Why am I am advocate for HIV/AIDS education? Read above.

My Seduction Style

2009-02-27T10:58:00.001-05:00

So I need a brain break and one of my lovely friends emailed a test to see what your seduction style is. Here are my results:

Enjoy and take the quiz too. It's really cute and fun.

Fashion Week 2009-William Rast

2009-02-17T13:22:00.012-05:00

Well I'm in New York for Fashion Week. I am working with Ground Crew (the same company I did Victoria's Secret for) as a dresser. Last night I worked the Tony Cohen show in the tents and I had the chance to attend the William Rast show. The Tony Cohen collection was really cute. It was a collection of lightweight dresses, slim fitting pants and interestingly cut shirts. Here's a link to the review of the collection by Women's Wear Daily: Tony Cohen Ready To Wear Collection-Fashion Week 2009

I got to dress the lovely Martha who was a pleasure to work with for my first show.

After working the Tony Cohen show, we went into the Lobby to wait for the William Rast show. We crowded in to wait for the show to start and I scanned the crowd for celebrities. I spotted Anothony Anderson, Miss J of American's Next Top Model, Aisha Tyler and Aubrey formerly of the group Danity Kane pretty quickly. It got more crowded so I stopped scanning and waited for the show. From what I've seen in the past the William Rast line is a fairly casual line but the clothes have a great fit and clean lines. I was excited to see what they would be offering for the fall.

I was disappointed. From the looks of it, they were going for a retro vibe but they chose to focus on denim with sparkly jackets, rhinestones and scarves. Unfortunately to me the line looked like the kind of stuff I've seen in stores like Kmart in the 90's. I didn't like the retro look of the clothes and overall the line wasn't overly exciting. In spite of that, it was cool to be there and I look forward to working Michael Kors tomorrow and possibly attending some more shows. Check out the pics and judge for yourself:

Here's a review of the line from examiner.com: William Rast-Fashion Week 2009
Enjoy the pictures and check back for more Fashion Week coverage.

Atlanta Relationship Examiner: Happy National Condom Day: How to properly put on a condom

2009-02-10T18:51:00.001-05:00

Atlanta Relationship Examiner: Happy National Condom Day: How to properly put on a condom

Posted using ShareThis

Video Blog!

2009-01-30T09:30:00.004-05:00

Hi there! Here's another video blog from me. I am working on stepping up my video game with a web cam so hopefully the shaky cam video will cease soon. Enjoy!

Great video by a single mom about Ann Coulter

2009-01-23T12:00:00.003-05:00

While doing some research, I came across this great blog by a single mother. The blog is called Ms Single Mama and the website is www.mssinglemama.com. I found this blog both entertaining and informative. I was browsing through it when I came across a post that she'd written about Ann Coulter's book, Guilty. Well I'm not a follower of Ann Coulter but from what I've seen and read about her, she is very right wing in her views and she has no problem taking direct aim at specific people or groups. While I can't fault her for her beliefs, I can definitely fault her for her tactics. Ms Single Mama posted a video on CNN's website, www.ireport.com about some of the statistics that Ann Coulter is using to support her current attack on single mothers in her new book. This video was very well done and she made some great points. I wanted to share it with you. I'm not a single mother but before my mom and my stepdad got together, I was being raised by a single mother. Although that was a short time period in my life, I saw my mom do her thing with taking care of me and handling her business. I have so much respect for single mothers. Please take a moment to watch this video then visit her blog at www.mssinglemama.com.

Review of Notorious

2009-01-17T18:50:00.004-05:00

Earlier today I took some time to check out the newly released movie about the great rapper, Notorious B.I.G. For those that aren't familiar, Notorious B.I.G. or Biggie Smalls was a rapper that came to glory in the late 90's and was killed at the age of 24 in 1997. He was the protege of Diddy (who was Puffy or Puff Daddy back then) and one of the early artists signed to Bad Boy Records.

Notorious starts in the 80's with Christopher Wallace (Biggie Smalls) as a kid in elementary school in the Bed stuy area of Brooklyn, NY. He is attending a private school and you can tell that his mom placed a lot of emphasis on education. The movie moves through his life and shows how he was lured into the street life becoming a drug dealer while in elementary school. By the time he was 17, he was making lots of money and living the high life. The movie goes on to chronicle how he was introduced to Diddy, who was working at Uptown Records at the time, and subsequently became known as one of the greatest rappers of all time at the ripe old age of 24.

I have never been a hard core hip hop fan. In fact, I gave away my copy of Biggie's first album, Ready to Die, because I just wasn't feeling it at the time. I do still have the copy of his second project, Life After Death, that I liked a lot more. In spite of me not being a hard core hip hop fan, I do work in the music industry and I have a lot of respect for hip hop. I am a fan of the way that some rappers are able to use words to create a picture. Biggie was very good at doing that. Initially he created vivid pictures of his life growing up in Brooklyn and being on the block. As he grew, he began to paint pictures of his life as a superstar recording artist, living the good life. I appreciate him for that.

The movie was really good. I think the actors all held their own and the guy playing Biggie, Jamal Woolard, really morphed into the late rapper. I could tell he really studied his movements, rap style, voice and even his different personas. As an artist, Christopher Wallace had to wear different faces. Jamal was able to successfully move between Christopher Wallace, Biggie Smalls and Notorious B.I.G. There were even times when I felt like I was looking at Biggie himself but not in an eerie way. Jamal did a wonderful tribute to a guy that was extremely multifaceted.

Some people saw Biggie as simply a drug dealer turned rapper but he was also a man, son, father and friend. I think the movie humanized him. It did a great job of showing the different aspects of him as a person and making him more real. Before I saw the movie, I only saw him as a superstar that was taken away before he got to truly realize his talents and abilities. Now that I've seen the movie, I can better empathize with his family and friends. I got to a glimpse into his relationship with Diddy (Puffy) and how close they truly were as well as his tumultuous relationships with Faith and Lil Kim.

I recommend this movie to anyone. If you are a fan of hip hop, I definitely think you should check this out. If you are curious about the music industry and how things can go sometimes, you should check it out. In a nutshell, I give this movie four out of five stars. I wish the movie had focused on at least one of his relationships more and gone more into it. From what I saw, Biggie was fiercely loyal and loved hard. I would have liked to see that explored with at least one of the people closest to him. Overall, it was a good movie. Go check it out.

A sexy Marvin Gaye song

2009-01-15T20:19:00.002-05:00

This is the song that is playing in the background on the commercial I posted earlier for the perfume, Jadore. I have to say that I stopped by the department store to smell Jadore because I was considering buying it. I did not like it. It smelled really flowery. I was disappointed because with that commercial, I figured it would smell more heady with musky undertones or a hint of sandalwood or something. A scent that's almost masculine but light enough to be a perfume. Nonetheless, I still love the commercial and one big reason is this song. Enjoy!

A New Year...and the adventures continue plus a video!

2009-01-07T09:45:00.004-05:00

Happy New Year everyone! It's finally 2009 and things started off really nicely for me. I went to a friend's house and set off some fireworks to bring in the new year. Then we played a serious game of taboo for shots. It was the guys against the girls and we kicked the guys booties! They took a couple of shots while we only had to take one in a close heat in the final game. It was lots of fun and I felt good about going as I sleepily drove home.

After that a good friend of mine had a birthday party at her new apartment the following Saturday. We've known each other since 9th grade and have been close ever since 10th. She loves to have gatherings where everyone comes over, has some drinks, plays spades and chats about things. So that's what she did. She looked really cute and I'm very happy for her because she has two of the cutest little girls and while she was pregnant with her second, she lost her job. Now she has a new job and things are much more improved for her. Well since we went to high school together, her gatherings are often a mini high school reunion. Apparently we are some of the rare people that still actively keep in touch with people we went to high school with. I talk to so many people that may keep in touch with one or two people where we keep in touch with a large majority of our class along with people that were the class before and class after us.

Well this party was no different so the guests were a mix of her co-workers and her friends, some of which are from high school and others from elementary or both. Well one of her friends from both elementary school and high school came and she is six months pregnant. Well me and this lady weren't close in high school but we did cross paths occasionally. She was always very over the top in some of her antics and this has not changed. She came in with a small bottle of Patron Tequila in her purse that she claimed was for the birthday girl, but I have my suspicions. Then she proceeds to partake of the food (which was very cool because she is 6 months pregnant) and the drinks (which wasn't cool because she is 6 months pregnant). The funny thing is that I was disturbed but not overly surprised. Not necessarily because she is a destructive person (which I don't know her well enough to know) but because she has always been over the top. What I've noticed that the way people act in high school doesn't change a whole lot over time. If someone is considered an oddball (which I was), they will still be an oddball after high school. If someone is very over the top and extra (as she was), they will still be over the top and extra.

I actually doubt that she drinks very much because she has three other children and is in school to become a medical assistant. So I see that there is a responsible adult in there but that's not the image she chooses to display and I suppose that's ok. Now what I did find an issue with was a story she told about being arrested. Her being arrested wasn't that shocking because with traffic tickets and some of the over zealous police in Atlanta, it can happen. The bad thing was that when she was pulled over, they discovered she had a warrant in one county and arrested her for that. She proceeded to curse the arresting office out because they only arrested her for the one warrant rather than the FIVE warrants she had in another county. Several fouls occurred here. A mother of three has SIX outstanding warrants and when she escape arrest for FIVE of them, she CURSES out the officer because he arrests her for only one. I'm surprised she isn't still in jail today, goodness.

But then this raised a question with a friend of mine as we recapped the party afterward. Because we were slightly shocked and appalled at the whole situation, we wondered if we were bougie. So it inspired me to keep a running tally on examples of bougieness. I will save that blog for another day. So stay tuned and enjoy my first video. I'll be adding a video component to this blog so I hope you enjoy the upgrade.

My how things have changed

2008-12-30T14:50:00.002-05:00

I know it's been a while since I've written. Life has swept me up in it's whirlwind. It's almost the end of 2008 and overall this year turned out ok for me. It wasn't always the easiest year and there were some challenges along the way but I'm coming out on the other side, wiser and more determined than ever.

Unfortunately I lost another classmate about a month ago. She passed away from a heart attack at the very young age of 30. It caught me off guard and I can only imagine how it affected her family. I'm just now realizing how sad it was and how glad I am that I got a chance to hang out with some of my classmates at a recent bowling outing.

Oddly enough, the people who attended the outing weren't people that I hung out with while we were in high school but it was cool to spend some time with them now that we're adults. It was equally cool and disturbing to see how many people are married and/or have kids. I was definitely in the minority being single and childless.

One thing I noticed is how everyone seemed to regress a bit the longer we were out. It always amazes me how certain people from my past tend to take me back to how I was at that point in time when we were close. It also amazes me to watch other people go back to that time when they're around me or someone else. I watched this happen with amusement this past weekend. I'm sure some of the regression could be attributed to the alcohol that was being drunk by virtually everyone but it was funny to watch nonetheless.

I even found myself regressing a bit because it felt a little odd to be sitting across from a gentleman that I might have spoken to on occasion but we didn't interact very often when we were in high school. We chatted it up fairly well and things were cool.

Then I ran into quite a few college associates at another event. It was cool to see those people as well but there was no regression on my part. In fact, I was ok with just saying hello and giving a hug then keeping things moving.

Overall this has been a weekend of short reunions for me, which I appreciate and enjoy for many reasons. The biggest one is that it shows me how far I've come and how much I've grown.

I'll see you again in 2009. Be on the lookout for some cool new developments with this blog as well.

Jadore Commercial

2008-12-19T18:06:00.002-05:00

This is one of my favorite commercials. It's so sexy!

Victoria's Secret Fashion Show part 2

2008-12-04T20:28:00.006-05:00

Last night the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show came on CBS. I was finally able to watch the show that I had worked backstage for. The show looked great! The ladies looked wonderful in their outfits and even Usher looked really good performing. It was a great production and I'm proud to have participated.

Here are some pics of the model that I helped dressed mainly. Her name is Izabel Goulart.

This was her first outfit. I really loved those shoes and her wings were cool too.

This was her second outfit. Cute, right? That feather head piece was interesting to put on but once it was on, it was fabulous!

Nice holiday greeting from our soon to be first family

2008-11-20T07:53:00.001-05:00

Happy Holidays from the Obamas

Victoria's Secret Fashion Show!!!

2008-11-17T19:44:00.007-05:00

Apparently my travels haven't ended for the year. This past weekend I had a wonderful opportunity. Last week, a friend of mine who works in the fashion and beauty industry as a publicist, stylist, image consultant, etc called me and asked if I was interested in working at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show this past Saturday. I knew she was going because she had told me about it and she works as a dresser in lots of fashion shows.

Well when she called me, my immediate response was a resounding yes. I have been wanting to get into more fashion show production work and this was a great opportunity to gain some experience. Plus, the show was being held in Miami and I don't need that much of an excuse to go down there. She called me Tuesday and early Thursday morning I hopped into my little Civic and got on the road to Miami. It's a 10 hour road trip that's definitely not for the faint of heart but I was excited to go.

When I got there, I got a bit lost making my way to the hotel where we were staying but it didn't matter too much. I was in Miami Beach and it was HOT! By hot, I mean hot in temperature. It felt like summer had never left. This was a bit disconcerting since it's November but I adjusted fairly quickly and put my air conditioning to use.

I found out that I didn't have to work until Saturday so I had an unauthorized vacation in Miami to enjoy. I got to the hotel and rested. Unfortunately I had caught a cold on Wednesday so I had to stop by the CVS and buy some cold medicine. I chilled in the room and waited for my three roommates to arrive/return. When everyone got there, we struck out for dinner. We ended up at this cute little restaurant with tables outside on South Beach. It was very chic and cute so we ordered some small meals and enjoyed being outside. Unfortunately other people enjoyed the outside by smoking cigars and cigarettes freely, which we are not used to because in New York (where my roomies are from) and Atlanta, smoking is prohibited a lots of places.

The next day, we had to go get our credentials for the fashion show and we had a prep meeting for the show. We also knew that there would be a grand opening party at the hotel where the show would be held and we wanted to go. We got dressed and headed out for the meeting and party. We were very unsuccessful at getting our credentials so we thought the party was a no go. We headed for the meeting. After the meeting we headed downstairs and discovered that we could "blend" into the party. So we blended.

It was a very interesting mix of people. It was definitely a star studded event. The appetizers were gourmet and the bar was open. We enjoyed a nice performance by Terrence Howard as we watched the celebs mingle. Like a big dork, I made a list of all of the celebs that I recognized and knew their names. Like to see it, here it goes:

Kim and Chloe Kardashian (Kim is so cute!)
Brody Jenner and Frankie (for those fans of The Hills)
Jessica Lowndes (Adrianna of the new 90210)
Martha Stewart
Russell Simmons
AJ (formerly of 106 and Park)
Terrence Howard (I also saw him after he performed...lovely man!)
Robin Thicke
Whitney from America's Next Top Model
Sophia Delgado (I think that's her last name)
A-rod (sans Madonna)
Brett (Heidi's former boss from The Hills. for those hard core Hills fans)
Enrique Murciano from Without a Trace (I'm a fan of the show)
Charro
Mariah Carey (she performed)

I'm not one to be star struck but it was very cool to see so many "familiar" faces. After Terrence Howard performed, we heard that Mariah Carey was going to be performing in another room. It was an even more exclusive party. We got in with one of the models that my friend knows. Once in, we were just in time to see Mariah Carey perform. I'd never seen her live and it was really cool. She sounds awesome in concert but I figured she would. Here are a few pics of her performing.

After she performed, we headed out. We hopped in a car to go get some rest for the next day. We got up Saturday and prepared to head out for the day. Since me and Amaris didn't have our credentials, we had to head to the hotel early to get them. After we ate a late lunch, we headed down to the Fontainebleu to get ready for the show. It only took 10 minutes for us to get our credentials after which we headed down to the fabulous lobby to enjoy some down time before the show. While we were headed into the lobby, we saw George Hamilton. He looked really orange in person.

At 5, we headed upstairs to get ready to work. When we were escorted backstage, I was excited. All of the models racks were set up, ready to go. I was assigned to assist another dresser with her model. It was cool because it was my first show and that made me feel comfortable. We dressed Izabel and she had two really cute costumes with extra pieces that were a bit complicated. After the first show, I realized that I would enjoy being a dresser for other shows. After the second show, it was all over. It was the most fun! I can't wait to check out the show when it airs, December 3 at 10pm EST on CBS.
The drive back was horrendous but I pushed through it and now I'm back home.

The President Elect of the United States of America is...

2008-11-06T14:50:00.003-05:00

Barack Obama! It was the greatest feeling in the world to see a candidate that I wholly supported be elected into office. It was an awesome feeling to have been a part of the process in electing the first black president of the United States. I put together a collage of sorts to commemorate the occasion.

Whassup 2008

2008-10-31T08:08:00.001-04:00

The whassup guys are back supporting Obama. This is funny even though it's not funny. Check it out.

More about Cabo...

2008-10-27T18:35:00.002-04:00

Well after we walked around downtown Cabo, bought some souvenirs and were sexually harassed, we headed back to the resort to rest before we came back out later that night.

We made some friends on the resort and once we got dressed, we ran into them in the lobby. They were heading out so we all piled into the taxi and rode back into the city together. They were a pair of newlyweds on their honeymoons so they were feeling very festive. We went back to Cabo Wabo but this time it was open and the people were partying! We went in and had a shot of blue tequila. Yummy and smooth! Then we made our way to the dance floor. The music was a lot of old school from the 70's, 80's and early 90's. It was a very mixed crowd so that kind of music was perfect.

As we danced around, we were shocked to see one of our friends get into a scuffle with a gentleman and then with club security. It was crazy because the guy started things with our friend but our friend was the one removed from the club. We tried to talk to security but they were not hearing anything we had to say. After that, our friends hopped into a cab and said good bye for the evening. We decided to keep the party going and walked down to Squid Row. It was a much more stripped down club than Cabo Wabo. In comparison, I would say that Cabo Wabo was the nice, sexy spot and Squid Row was the college spot. It was like a spot that you would hit up every weekend in college. We had a blast!

The next day we decided to partake in some more water sports. Me and two of my friends went parasailing. It was so cool! If you've never been, you should definitely go. It was so peaceful floating above the boat and the water. Then as we headed back, the guy driving the speedboat let us take turns and control the speed. One of my friends tried to kill us by going extremely fast. I dove for the floor so that I wouldn't be thrown from the boat as we bounced violently in the waves. It was all so much fun though.

After all of that excitement, we decided that we would chill out for the rest of the trip. We relaxed for the rest of the day by the pool. The next day some of us got up and took the yoga class offered on the resort. It was a great way to wrap up the trip. We got a great stretch by the pool. One of the ladies also got a full body massage. After that we focused on relaxing and laid out by the pool with our books and study materials (yes some of us did study for various tests but who doesn't mind studying under the tropical sun in a swimsuit by a pool?).

The next day we had to be up at the crack of dawn (actually before the crack of dawn) because our flight left at 8:05am. Two of my friends had a later flight so they decided to revisit the clubs while the rest of us relaxed at the resort. Since I was starting to catch a cold, I knew it was best for me to take it easy. Also, the next day was one of the other ladies' birthday so we got her room decorated and did a corona toast while singing happy birthday.

The next morning we got up hella early and headed to the lobby to wait for our car to take us to the airport. We ran into our friends who had just gotten back from the club and were chillin by the bar chatting with some of our other resort friends. We said goodbye to them and left for the airport. I figured once we got there, things would be routine. I was wrong.

When we were headed to Cabo, we had to fill out these forms and get a tourist card. We got that card stamped as we entered the country along with our passports. Well we needed that card to leave the country. Unfortunately one of my friends had thrown hers away and didn't have it. To make matters worse, the immigration office didn't open until 7am and our flight was scheduled to start boarding at 7:20am. We weren't sure she would make it on the flight. Fortunately she came rushing in a few minutes before our flight started boarding and made it just in time.

It was one adventure after another but lots of fun. Now I'm done with my international travels for the year as I focus on work and my business. Pictures from Cabo in the next post. Come back now, ya hear!

fresh from the shores of Cabo!!

2008-10-24T20:16:00.002-04:00

Now that I've finished my Italy trip description, I can tell you about my adventures in Cabo. It was a great 5 days. I got the chance to truly relax and release. I didn't sleep in too often because we had to wake up for breakfast but I did manage to take naps by the pool and on the beach. It was awesome!

I went to Cabo for my friend's birthday. She wanted to bring it in under a tropical sun and that's exactly what we did. We spent most of the time lounging by the pool so I got a chance to work on my tan (which I needed. I was starting to go back to my winter coloring, which is a few shades lighter than my summer coloring). So now I'm a lovely caramel brown, which I enjoy.

Back to the trip. The first day we arrived, we put on our swimsuits and promptly headed out to enjoy the lovely pool (I'll include pictures at the end). We wanted to take full advantage of the resort's activities so after laying out in the sun, we dressed for dinner. One of the entertainment staff told us they would be performing Les Miserables and we were intriguied. After dinner we headed to the stage to check it out.

It was quite interesting to see them lipsync the different broadway tunes. Apparently it was a mixture of hit broadway plays. It was odd to watch them lip sync because not all of the performers spoke English as a first language and it showed. We were so tired that we started dropping while trying to watch the show. Most of us headed to bed. Of course I was one of them.

The next day, we got up early to jog on the beach. As soon as we attempted to walk briskly on the coarse, deep sand, we realized that jogging would be out of the question. It was a workout just walking but we pressed on. After about 30 minutes of walking, we pushed on for another 15 minutes before we headed back to meet the other ladies for breakfast. I wasn't sure if I would be doing that again. We ate breakfast and then put on our swimsuits for a day of lounging around the pool. After a few hours of that, we lounged on the beach. It was wonderful.

The next day we headed into town to go to the marina to catch a boat that would take us on a tour of the Arcs, Pelican Island and Lover's Beach where we would go snorkeling. It was very cool riding the boat in the pretty, blue water. We saw some pelicans, sea lions and cool looking fish. Unfortunately the snorkeling didn't work so well for me. I couldn't navigate those darn flippers on my feet so well but it was fun trying even though I got a LOT of sand in my swimsuit bottom.

We walked around the town and were offered jewelry, candy, weed, cocaine and sexual favors. Those guys in Mexico were very open about what they had to offer. We were called "brown sugar" quite a few times as well. It was funny and kind of traumatizing at the same time. It didn't help that initially we were walking around in our swimsuits as we waited to dry off. My friend had her picture snapped on a camera phone while taking a shower in her bikini to rinse the sand off. Hopefully she doesn't end up on some girls gone wild in Mexico website. We walked around and bought some souvenirs before we headed back to the resort.

I must stop now and continue this story later...

My Italian getaway-Venice

2008-10-20T10:23:00.007-04:00

As my whirlwind Italian tour came to a close, we had a chance to visit Venice. While in Milan, we hopped on a train and took the 2 hour trip to the city that floats. I'm not sure if that's an official thing but that's how I see Venice. It is literally built on the water, which is really cool.

When we arrived in Venice, we were greeted by our guide and given a walking tour of the city, which was the cutest city ever! It is filled with churches and water and cool shops. I wish that we had more time there because it was my second favorite city in Italy so far. We took a ride in the small canals on a gondola, which was cool aside from the smelly water. Check out the pics:

The lady in the picture is Bella Kim. She's also from Atlanta and we enjoyed the gondola ride along with four other bellas.

This was our gondola driver. He spoke very little English but he was really nice and attempted to be helpful and answer our questions.

After the gondola ride, we continued to walk around Venice and do a little shopping. We didn't have a lot of time so we had to walk swiftly back to the train depot so that we wouldn't be left in Venice. It was a fairly low key trip with some great sightseeing and cool shopping. We did have dinner at a lovely restaurant with great tasting food. I really plan on going back to Venice to spend more time...maybe during carnival.

My Italian getaway-Milan

2008-10-19T01:38:00.009-04:00

After visiting (and falling in love with) Florence, I hopped on another motor coach and headed excitedly to Milan. I was excited because we would be there during Milan Fashion Week and I was imaging the city being filled with fashionistas and other fashion industry insiders attending shows in a tent much like they do in Bryant Park in New York.

No such luck. Fashion Week in Milan is very low key with the fashion shows being held in tucked away places like lofts and small clubs. I know this because I asked around. So nonetheless, I wanted to get out and enjoy the city of Milan.

The first day we arrived after stopping to do some outlet shopping outside of the city. The outlets were cool and the prices were ok but after the euro to dollar exchange, we really weren't saving that much money. It was cool to go though. If you are in Milan and want to do some shopping, I recommend checking out the outlets.

After we arrived, we decided to check out happy hour. It was really cool, especially since there were good drinks for a reasonable price and pretty good hors devours. Then we went to dinner and I had some of Milan's signature dish; risotto. It was pretty good. We enjoyed eating outside and a bottle of red wine before we headed back to the hotel to get ready for our trip to Venice in the morning (which I will discuss in the next blog). Me and my travel buddies decided not to go to the club with the other ladies. Here is a picture of me in the duomo.

Good times! We also did a walking tour of Milan where our tour guide showed us how the ride the subway (it was a bit confusing and we had to take a commuter train along with the subway) as well as some of the cool stuff to do in Milan. As she showed us around, we came across the first Prada store. I didn't go inside but I did take a picture of it. Like to see it, here it goes:

One day, when I have a Prada checkbook, I will return to the store and shop. Until then, I have this picture for my memories. Well the last day in Milan, we hit the town. We hopped on the commuter train and went into the city to really explore. We had heard that the canals were really cool to visit and had some good restaurants so we made that our first stop (after I found out the Leonardo Da Vinci exhibit was sold out, I'm a fan). We went down to the canals but were a bit disappointed. They weren't all that sexy but we found a cute restaurant and I had some pizza with interesting cheese on it. It had a great flavor but wasn't the type of cheese you would immediately associate with pizza. I can't remember the name, though. Here are the canals.

After that, we headed back to the duomo and checked out some of the shops. We also made it a point to enjoy some gelato from this wonderful place called Grom. It was recommended to my travel buddy, Tiffani and it was well worth the recommendation. Plus it was the nicest gelato places that we'd visited. I also highly recommend Grom for anyone that is in Milan and looking to try some gelato. Great place to start. Here's a picture of the menu (in Italian of course.

Grom was lovely and had great gelato. But we were very tired so we hopped on the commuter train to head back to the hotel. We had to get in bed kind of early to be ready for the airport the next day. However, we were hungry when we got back to the hotel and there weren't many places nearby that were open. We did some scouting and after coming up empty, we resigned ourselves to have our last Italian meal be McDonald's in Milan. It was pretty good. I got a chicken sandwich that had a slightly Italian twist and the fries tasted exactly the same. I figured that a trip to McDonald's was a good way to end the trip anyway.

As I sleepily ate the McDonald's in our plush hotel lobby, I felt good about the trip. Everything turned out really good and even though Milan wasn't as fly as I thought, it is still a city I'd visit again.

My Italian getaway-Florence

2008-10-09T13:44:00.010-04:00

After an action packed three days in Rome, we all got on a motor coach and headed to Florence. Although I liked Rome, I was excited to go to another city and see if it was any different. Who knew that we would start our adventure to Florence with one last adventure in Rome?

As we were departing, it became obvious that our bus driver had made a wrong turn when he started backing up. I was sitting in the front so from my end, everything was fine, but the ladies in the back began to yell out for him to watch out. Apparently there was a car behind him and he was getting close to hitting it. Unfortunately our driver didn't speak much English so he just gestured and said that he had it under control (but not in those exact words). Apparently he didn't have it under control because he did end up hitting the car. As he gets off of the bus to deal with the accident, I thought that it would take an hour or so for the police to come and everything to get all sorted out. Boy was I wrong. 15 minutes later, the driver was back on the bus and we were on our way. No police were called. Both drivers just exchanged insurance and contact information and went on their way. It was amazing!

So we were finally off to Florence. The bus driver finished backing up and we hopped on the expressway (if that's even what they call them in Italy) to Florence or Firenze. It was a very scenic trip so I enjoyed looking out the window until I took a quick nap. Here's a picture of a rest stop that we made on the way.
After we loaded up on snacks and had a bathroom break, we were back on the road. Before we arrived in Florence, we made a stop at this lovely little town in the Tuscan region of Italy called San Gimignano. It was a very cute little town that looked like something out of a Disney movie. I almost expected to see some cartoon birds and animals come out and start playing around. We stopped there for an hour or so and did some shopping. It was really nice. I would love to spend a few days there and just enjoy the scenery.

Here is a picture of San Gimignano.

The amazing thing is that a car drove down this street along with the people walking. Can you imagine a car driving down this street? It's crazy, I know. After we enjoyed San Gimignano, we got on the new motor coach (the old one sprang an oil leak when we had our accident) and headed on toward Florence. We had one more stop in the town of Greve in the Chianti region of Italy. Greve was also a very cute little town, but it was a bit bigger than San Gimignano. We stopped there for an hour and some of the ladies enjoyed a wine tasting. We'd gone to a wine shop and they had it set up where you could go around and taste some of the various wines that they sold. I didn't participate because it wasn't a tasting led by a sommelier or anything. Me and my travel buddies decided to walk around and explore the town some. Here's a picture of Greve.

I would also love to take a few days and enjoy Greve and the rest of the Chianti region of Italy. I really like Chianti wine. We were only there for an hour before we got back in the motor coach and continued on our journey. An hour later or so, we arrived in Florence. We found out that our hotel was right in the city center and we were excited. There were tons of shops, restaurants and other things within walking distance of our hotel. We hopped off the bus, tipped the driver and headed inside to wait for our room assignments. I stopped by Tiffany's (one of my travel buddies) and found out that there was a dinner outing being planned and that we needed to be dressed and ready to go in 20 minutes or so. I headed back up to my room and got ready for a night out on the town in Florence. We had dinner at a nice restaurant. I ate pizza that was good, but not as good as the pizza in Rome. After dinner we headed to this really cool nightclub called YAB (you are beautiful). It was hip hop night so there was a good mix of hip hop, r&b and old school music played. The club was a nice size and had a room playing dance music as well. It was a very diverse crowd and everyone was dancing and enjoying themselves. Take a look at it. Good times!

Well after YAB, we went back to the hotel room to rest for the next day's outings. The next day we had a walking tour of Florence and got to do some shopping afterward. I found this very cute burnt orange purse that I had been looking for. I became slightly obsessed with finding a cute orange purse in Italy after my friend visited and came back with this very cute burnt orange bag. Mine is a lighter burnt orange but I like it and it's unique. We spent the rest of time in Florence walking (some more) and enjoying the city. It's such a cute city and I defintely plan on going back to visit longer. I even rubbed the nose of the lucky Boar that ensures that I will return to Florence. Here's a picture of it.

Florence is one of my definite favorite cities in Italy so far. It's a very cool mix of old Italian culture and history and current culture. If you ever get a chance to visit Italy, I strongly suggest you take some time to visit Florence. Stay tuned for the next leg of my Italian getaway...

My Italian getaway-Rome

2008-10-03T10:19:00.009-04:00

Well once I made it on the plane and settled in for the 9 hour flight, I was able to truly relax and spent most of the flight sleeping. I did get a chance to watch a couple of movies and enjoy the pretty good in flight food as well.

9 hours later, we landed in Rome. Since our flight left in the evening, it was essentially an overnight flight and it was Friday morning when we landed in Rome. Our itinerary had suggested that we get sleep on the plane because we would be hitting the ground running and we do just that.

We got our rooms and went quickly upstairs to drop off our bags and head back downstairs to eat lunch and have orientation. During orientation, we got our metro passes and a rundown of the overall tour. Then we ran quickly upstairs to shower and change to head out for our Vespa tour of Rome. Unfortunately it had started to rain but the tour went on regardless. We headed out and met our tour drivers. Mine was a nice older gentleman who spoke absolutely no English but made me feel safe on the Vespa. Here's his picture.

Now I've seen people ride Vespas in Atlanta but not like they do in Italy. In spite of lines showing the different lanes, it is apparently ok to share the lane with a car. It was definitely a learning experience to ride on a Vespa through Rome. Plus the sights were lovely. I would highly suggest it to anyone taking a trip to Rome but it's definitely not for the faint of heart.

Once we finished our tour, we were cold and wet so we all headed upstairs to rest before going out that evening. Later on, we jumped in a taxi in groups of four and headed to a happy hour spot. The only issue: no one knew the name of the place, only the area of town. Our lovely, non-English speaking driver drove us to the area but didn't know where to drop us off. So while he and the lady in the front seat argued (in two different languages mind you), we drove through these tiny alleyways. When I spotted some of the other ladies (Bellas from now on), I suggested we get out of the cab but was denied the request. The ladies I was with refused to exit the cab so I watched helplessly as the metered continued to tick away. Eventually the driver stopped and told us to get out of the taxi (in Italian mind you). I can't verify that he said get out but his body language and rapid fire language gave me the impression he was saying "Get the hell out of my taxi!"

We got out and found the other Bellas who were also roaming around confused. A few minutes later we found our lead Bella Feleace (I hope I spelled that right) and she took us to Beige. It was a very hip bar that had great drinks for great prices (7 euro for a large mojito and they free pour...no jiggers in Italy!). After stopping to eat a pizza (as served by our adorable waiter), we enjoyed a drink at Beige while we waited to go to the next place (which was Alibi-pronounced AL-I-BEE). Here are the Bellas at Beige:

Beige was really nice and the music was cool. It was the techno type of music that isn't really great to dance to all night but it was good to sit for a moment and enjoy a GREAT tasting mojito to. As it got close to midnight, we learned that we would be heading to the next place soon. Apparently the clubs in Rome don't start popping until about midnight so we all headed outside to hop in a taxi. This time I got the name of the place and Bella April got the address. We were all set to go! We hopped in the taxi and headed over to Alibi. When we walked in, the music was very similar to the music we heard at Beige. We were slightly disappointed because we had been told the music was going to be more hip hop than techno. We waited around until we saw some of the other Bellas and they advised us to go upstairs. We hadn't even seen stairs! We went and heard some great music so we danced for a few hours before heading back to the hotel. First night in Rome!

The rest of the trip in Rome was just as much of an adventure. The next day was spent touring the Sistine Chapel and the Vatican Museum. Who knew it was so large? My feet hurt horribly. We had walked for about 10 hours. By the time we got back to the hotel, we all passed out and didn't make it out to dinner with the rest of the Bellas but we were hungry so we struck out on our own armed with our metro passes and a map. It was a great evening. We made it to a nice restaurant and back with no incident and lots of stopping of total strangers who spoke english. It was fun. I also discovered gelato that day and it was WONDERFUL! We had it twice and I proclaimed that we should have gelato every day and everyone agreed. The last day in Rome was a free day so we slept in a bit and then ventured out again armed with our metro passes and a map. We visited the Coliseum and the place next to it (I can't remember the whole name but it had the Domus Augustus in it). It was all very awe inspiring. Plus we got taken by a guy dressed as a Gladiator. We stopped and took a picture with him and he attempted to charge us 3 euro a piece. It was 5 of us so he tried to come up on 15 euro for a quick picture. We gave him what we had and walked on. Be careful of the Gladiator when you visit the Coliseum!

Stay tuned for the next city on the action packed tour...

I think I have 5 friends that read this blog...

2008-10-02T15:03:00.001-04:00

I really like this video. Check it out.

My Italian getaway

2008-10-01T15:06:00.000-04:00

Hi there!

It's been a while since I've written and I have a great reason. I went to Italy for 9 days and just recently returned. I wish that I had taken my laptop with me so I could blog while I was there but I wasn't that comfortable lugging my laptop on a tour that consisted of me hopping from Rome to Florence to Milan to Venice with a few stops in the Tuscan region. So here's the blog summary of my trip broken down by city. However, before I even made it to Italy I had a bit of an adventure. Ok, more than a bit. Want to hear about it...here it goes.

I was scheduled to depart for my Italian getaway on September 18. My flight left that afternoon with a layover in New York before we headed to Rome at 6:55pm. Well as I arrived to the airport at 10am, I was very much on schedule for the 12:55 flight. I took advantage of the extra time to walk around the airport and look for an Italian phrasebook that I had forgotten to pick up the day before. I got on the airport train to return to my terminal at about noon, confident that I would sit for a spell before the plane started boarding.

When I got to my gate, I noticed something odd. I didn't see any of the ladies that were going to Italy with me and there was an angry looking crowd of people standing around the counter. I notice that the sign at the gate said 12:25 for the flight departure to Bucharest. But I was confused so I went over to a gate agent and asked about the flight and discovered that it was gone. My heart sank. I went over to a ticketing agent to see if I could get on another flight and not have to pay too much money.

Luckily for me, the angry group of people was a good thing. The flight had been overbooked which meant that about 20 people weren't given seats on the flight which was taking almost everyone to New York to connect to an international flight. After visiting the ticketing agent, I was directed to join the group of people who were being taken care of after being booted from the flight. I was able to be booked on a 1:40 flight to LaGuardia that would put me in New York at 4 and give me enough time to catch the shuttle to JFK which is where my 6:55 flight to Rome was leaving from.

Relieved, I headed to my new terminal with a voucher for a free flight because the other one had been overbooked. As I boarded the plane, I felt a little better about things. I took a nap on the plane and woke up right before it was about to land. As we began the landing prep, the pilot came on the intercom. Apparently there was a lot of traffic on the airway to New York so we were asked to slow down which meant we would land about 15 later than initially scheduled.

As my stress level slowly rose, I tried to remain calm. After about 15 minutes we were cleared to land and I felt a bit better. Once we landed, I was told that we would have a shuttle to JFK airport but that we would have to see a delta agent about it. When I walked into the area, the agent walked the other way and out the other door. Annoyed, I walked around to see if I could just catch a shuttle but there weren't any around so I returned to the area and the agent had returned.

She called a car service for me and another gentleman who had a 7pm flight to Saudi Arabia. She assured me that it would take about 15 minutes for the car to arrive. 20 minutes later, she was calling back to check on things. As time slowly ticked by, I looked at the time and it was 4:45. I knew I should be at JFK by 6 in order to be cleared for the flight. The car pulled up at about 5:15 and we happily jumped inside. As he pulled into rush hour traffic, I was wondering how long it would take us to get there. As we drove slowly through traffic, my stress level began to rise. At about 5:55, we pulled up to JFK airport, which is huge. The driver dropped one guy off and then headed to the Delta terminal.

When he pulled up, I almost got out while the car was moving but I took a breath and waited for him to stop. As he handed me my suitcase, I waved goodbye to my travel companion and ran into the airport. Thankfully the boarding agent had checked me into both flights so I was able to go straight to security and to the gate. As I walked up, the ladies were glad to see me, which was nice. I took a moment and got a bottle of water and calmed down. I had made it! I was on my way to Italy.

I figured after making it through that adventure, I was up for anything once I arrived in Italy.

Stay tuned...

PS: I discovered that I had misread my airline ticket and my flight had indeed been scheduled to leave Atlanta at 12:25. Moral: Pay CLOSE attention to your flight schedule!

What really happens when Mario rescues the Princes

2008-09-16T08:14:00.002-04:00

For all of you out there that played any variation of Super Mario Brothers on any of the Nintendo game systems, here is a great video about what really happens when Mario rescues the Princess. It's classic!

Woman vs. A Grown Ass Woman

2008-09-08T22:38:00.003-04:00

Odd title. A woman is an adult so one would presume that a woman is the same as a grown ass woman, however this isn't entirely true. As I've gotten older, I've noticed that some people do not mature once they become officially an adult. I want to specifically address those women that, although their driver's license may say that they are well over 25, they act more like they are 22.

It stands to reason that when you reach a certain age, you can no longer get away with playing games and doing certain things that you might have done as a teen or in your early 20's. You are supposed to carry yourself like a mature women with some self-respect. You are supposed to demand that you be treated properly and treat others with the same respect you demand.

Sad to say, I have come across many women who are not grown ass women. They are biologically women but not mature by any means. It's unfortunate because those women make it hard for those of us who are indeed grown ass women. If you are unsure what makes a woman a grown ass woman, here is a short list.

A grown ass woman:

1. Carries herself in a respectful manner and gives that same respect to others
2. Is willing to apologize when she's wrong
3. Looks for opportunities for growth even when things aren't going her way
4. Is able to create meaningful relationships with both men and women

There are many other ways that differentiate a woman from a grown ass woman so please be aware. Just because a woman is grown age wise, doesn't mean she's a grown ass woman. All of us women need to work toward becoming a grown ass woman.

For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf

2008-08-26T23:50:00.003-04:00

This past Sunday I had the distinct opportunity to attend a showing of the play, "For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf". The play is currently running in Atlanta at the 14th Street Playhouse. It's being produced by IKAM Productions (www.ikamproductions.com) and directed by Jasmine Guy. It's her directorial debut.

The play is awesome! For those of you who aren't familiar with it, "For Colored Girls...is a choreopoem written by Ntozake Shange. It's a combination of monologues and poems performed by 7 ladies that are dressed in the colors of the rainbow. The play started with the Lady in Orange (she is usually the Lady in Brown but Jasmine wanted to stay true to the rainbow) and then progressed through the Lady in Yellow, Lady in Blue, Lady in Purple, Lady in Red and Lady in Green. It was a beautiful display of sheer talent as the ladies recounted stories of different women at different ages in different cities. The play's purpose is to speak to the difficulties and happy times as experienced by the woman of color.

Some of the monologues were happy and reminiscent. Others were heart wrenching and painful, but all of them gave a wonderful snapshot into the lives of women of color. Although the play was written in 1974, it is still very applicable today. I heard my story in several of the monologues and I was brought to tears more than once. My favorite line in the play was "I found God in myself and I loved her fiercely". That line stuck with me and penetrated my soul.

If you ever get a chance to see this play, take it. Do not let it pass you by.

Until I saw the play, I never truly understood the title but now I do. For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rain is Enuf. The Rainbow is indeed enuf...don't ever forget that

Honesty is the best policy

2008-08-19T14:49:00.003-04:00

Well if you've read about the escapades of the weekend barbecue that gave us the phrase of the day, "Have you sucked dick today?", then you remember that the guy who delivered the line was interested in me and we exchanged numbers. Well we had been texting back and forth since then and I could tell he's a nice guy. However, it was beginning to seem like he wasn't truly interested in getting to know me. But I wanted to have at least one extended phone conversation with him before I made a decision on him. Well we spoke briefly the other day and we talked about getting together.

He said that he wanted to see me, which for me is code for "I want you to come to my house". Since I'm not really looking to chill at anyone's house, I asked what would we do when we saw each other. He didn't really have a plan but he did make an annoying statement about me needing to be taken out to eat. I'm not trying to milk a guy's wallet and I hate being put in that box, especially when you haven't taken the time to really get to know me. Then he made a very telling statement about wanting to do something frugal. This told me that he didn't feel like he was financially able to really date.

I told him I was cool with whatever he decided. I really just wanted him to make a plan and then invite me along. Why oh Why do I have to force this guy to take the time to court me? Well our call ended because he had to do something. He promised to call me back but he didn't. The next day I got a text from him. This is basically what it said, "I like u, but I don't wanna waste your time. I'm not in a position to date. My intentions and desires are merely sexual..."

Oh boy...

So while I respect his honesty, I can't help but wonder if this is the status of dating right now. When we initially met, he mentioned not wanting to deal with women who treat him like a piece of meat. But he said that he was tired of dating people and waiting before he got physical with that person. He had apparently been doing that and it wasn't working for him so now he's focused on getting laid.

Interesting...

So now I'm back to square one as I work on reviving my dating life. I figured it would be an adventure and I was right. Stay tuned...

more weird craigslist stuff

2008-08-18T11:43:00.007-04:00

Well since I am in between film/tv projects, I have been trolling craigslist for opportunities. In spite of the prevalence of scams and other various shady work at home opportunities, craigslist is a very viable means for finding opportunities. I have landed quite a few great ones on there, American Idol and Pioneer Marketing are two noteworthy ones to mention. Ok back to the story.

I have been writing ever since I could string two sentences together. As a kid in elementary school, I used to write these horror stories and pass them around to my friends to read. Everyone always really liked them so I continued to explore my writing skills. As I got older, I branched out from horror to poetry to drama to erotica. I have always enjoyed writing descriptively and using adjectives liberally. I used to read romance novels avidly as a kid and I loved the colorful language. However, I always found some of the novels a bit too lovey dovey for my taste. Then I stumbled across some books that were less romance centered and more about just sex. It was a lot like written porn. Those were just as colorful but in a more graphic way. I discovered that I preferred to explore the world in between those two, erotica.

I've been writing erotic stories and poetry for years so when I came across an add on craigslist inquiring about partnering with a writer on an erotic novel, I was interested. I sent an email inquiry and got a response. The response was "sure thing. may i ask first how old are you". I responded with my age and the fact that I've been writing erotic stories and poems for a few years. The follow up response was "interesting. would love to discuss with you in further detail via the phone. may i call you whats your number"

I responded with my business cell number and waited for the call. Not too much longer I got a call from a guy. Initially it was ok. I had a weird feeling but I stayed on the phone because he hadn't said anything crazy until he said..."You have a sexy voice. Do you think I have a sexy voice?"

Now I'm thinking, "Oh Lord...what did I sign up for?" So I tell him that he sounds ok and he seemed disappointed that I didn't think he had a sexy voice. Then he starts asking me things about my fantasies and if I had done all of the things that I've written about. Now I'm thinking..."WTF?" Then here comes the kicker...he says that in order for us to be able to work together we should have phone sex and then write about it. Apparently he wants to develop this sexually tense relationship with someone and write about their sexual experiences with each other. So now I'm disturbed and uncomfortable when he says he has to go because he has another call. I'm relieved at the reprieve and make a mental note not to answer any more calls with his number, which showed up "Restricted".

Of course I did get another "Restricted" call later that day, which was ignored. Then I decided to be a bigger person and send him an email which said "Thanks for taking the time to speak with me about your idea for an erotic novel. However, I don't think that we work in similar ways when it comes to writing. I don't think you have to experience the things you write about to be a good novel and you appear to think the opposite. Good luck with your quest for an "expert writer" to teach you about writing erotica."

Goodness...when did it become ok to use the craigslist job ads as a way to find strangers to have sexual encounters with?

Weird Craigslist Ads

2008-08-10T23:14:00.005-04:00

I was browsing Craigslist looking for work. In spite of the potentially scary nature of some of the ads, I have actually found some great legitimate opportunities on there. So I tend to scan it daily, especially when I'm actively looking for work. Well this evening I was doing my Sunday browse and I came across two interesting ads. Enjoy!

Ad #1

Female Tour Guide (City of Atlanta)

Will be in Atlanta next weekend, looking for hopefully hott! guide to show us the city nite life. All expenses paid for next friday night and saturday, leaving sunday. Must be exceptional looking and comfortable in a short skirt. Pay is $1000.00. Please send picture or video if available. Thanks so much.

Ad #2

Writer Wants Literary Friend to Attend Events (all GA)

Simple: I'm a writer who wants a cool person to attend literary events with. (Such as the DBF, writers' conferences, and those things the Margaret Mitchell House is always having.) I find it easier to network with a wing-person, and so might you... we can avoid those nobody's-talking-to-me moments and probably have a much better time together than we would alone.

Makes no difference to me if you're male, female, gay, straight, black, white, whatever. Well, that's a lie... actually a nice white gay man would be awesome, but if you're something other than that, contact me anyway! I'll be open-minded! If anything I'd say please do not be a PTA mom who has written a Christian romance, and please do not be one birthday away from the nursing home.

I myself am a MWF, 43, conservative looking (meaning no tats, piercings, etc.). I live in an unfortunate suburb outside the perimeter. I'm short and chubby, so if you're too sexy to be seen with a fat person I guess I'll just have to miss out on you. However, to make up for my detriments, you may find that I am fairly well connected in the world of Southern lit.

Please be ready to drink, cuss, and bond with me over snarky criticisms of anybody who's more attractive and successful than we are.

Really?

Saturday adventures

2008-08-10T01:34:00.003-04:00

Wow...today was an interesting day. What started off as a typical Saturday with me going jogging first thing in the morning and then running some errands, turned into quite an adventure.

Ok, let me start from the beginning.

I woke up this morning and got dressed to go for a jog. I met a friend of mine who has recently started working out and he attempted to join me on my run. He walked a lot but felt better in the end, even though he disliked me for making him come out. After the run, I hit the ground running. I had to run my typical Saturday errands so I did those.

Earlier in the week, my friend had forwarded me an invite to a bbq that was being hosted by a graduate chapter of Omega Psi Phi. A co-worker of hers had invited her. Since I've decided that I'm going to be more open to meeting guys and dating, I was interested in going. But before we went, we decided to take a field trip to this store called Aphrodite's Toybox. You should check it out the next time you're in Atlanta or if you already live here. www.aphroditestoybox.com

That was an interesting hour or so and afterwards we were hungry so we went to eat at this great restaurant called Noodle. As we were talking, I shared with my friends that I wanted to start dating more and am open to being set up. This cemented us actually going to the bbq since there would definitely be guys there.

I was nervous since with graduate chapters the age demographic can vary widely but I was open so we hit the road and headed to the bbq. Well I didn't think by hitting the road we would be going on a freakin road trip. If you are familiar with Atlanta, you know that it's possible to drive for an hour and still be in the metro Atlanta area. Well we managed to almost do just that. Once we exited the expressway, we ended up on this long ass road that at one point was just trees. There were no lights, houses or even cars going by. We got nervous so we stopped at this gas station that looked like something out of a horror movie and asked this guy where the park was. He tells us "It's right there," and points. "You go through that stop sign and it's five seconds away."

We had to laugh because after the extended journey we took out to what I like to call West Hell, by the time we stopped to ask directions (because that was the ONLY gas station around), we were right there. So we headed over and as we pulled up and got out of the car, I was pleasantly surprised. There was a group of nice looking guys who looked to be in our age group. So we walk up and since it's so late, we are the only ladies in a crowd of gentlemen. This is definitely not a problem for me and my friends, so we walk on over.

One of the first things we notice is a big grill set up with some great smelling smoke coming out. The gentleman that had invited us offered us some chicken. We politely declined. We were offered chicken two more times and since it smelled so good, me and my friend decided to go ahead and sample it. That was some good chicken! Plus there was some sauce on it that made it taste even better. I had four pieces!

So we are all engaged in conversations with different people. The mingle factor was wonderful. I met a really nice guy that I hope calls me soon so we can hang out. He was a funny guy. He was telling people that we were girlfriend and boyfriend but it was kind of cute. We had some purple kool aid with liquor in it and then one guy walked over with this silver pouch and offered us some wine. It was awesome! I got some of the wine and it was actually really good. Since we got there so late, the guys were already packing things up so we got ready to go to a block party. We were about to pull out when the guy that I'd been talking to walked over to the car we were in. He had mentioned wanting something to drink because he was very thirsty. My friend had a bottle of ginger ale in her car. When he leaned into the window, he asked about the ginger ale. She said that it was hers and he asked if he could have it. She hesitated and he asked. "Have you sucked dick today?" This question was asked with the same expression that someone would have when asking "Have you gone to the store today?"

We laughed so hard! It was crazy that he was able to ask that kind of a question with a completely straight face. Then he waited patiently for the answer so that he could determine if he could have some of her ginger ale.

We headed over to the block party, which got even more interesting. This block party was really a party in the parking lot of this Jamaican restaurant (shack). There was a dj and a few coolers with "beverages" in it. When we walked up, there were guys standing around. We were asked for hugs and when I hugged one of the guys, it was the typical half hug I give people who are strangers. He says to me. "I want a two titty hug." Then he proceeds to hug me again including both of my boobs. By this point, I couldn't help but laugh and we headed over to the "dance area".

We didn't stay long because it was just too much and we were getting tired. We said goodbye to the gentleman that had invited us and headed back to our cars. As we were driving on the expressway and almost to our cars, we ran across some random debris on the expressway. That was it for us and we were happy to get to our cars and head home.

Remember. The question for the day is, "Have you sucked dick today?" Make sure you ask this of anyone who's drink you may want to sample. It apparently only counts for the day you are in. If they've done it the day before or a less than a week prior, it's fine. Feel free to drink their drink with a clear conscience.

Draining love...

2008-08-07T13:42:00.004-04:00

I was watching Keri Hilson's new video, "Energy" and it took me back to a few of my past relationships. If you ever feel like a relationship or "situation" is draining you more than it's uplifting you, walk away. I know, I know. That's much easier said than done but it's so important. Here is the video. Enjoy!

PS: Keri looks AWESOME in this video.

Getting my swagger back...is hard work

2008-08-06T21:58:00.003-04:00

As I said in the previous post, this has been an interesting year for me. There has been virtually no debauchery and at this point I'm working on getting my swagger back.

Earlier this year, I realized that I hadn't met anyone or been on a date in quite some time. Now I understand that people go through droughts, but how the hell do you go through a drought unintentionally without even realizing it? Once I realized I was in a drought, I began work to get out of it.

A break through came in the form of a random homeless guy. While I was working on the show that has kept me hella busy since February (Hell Date Season 2), a homeless guy approached my car. I was braced for the offer to wash my car or the request for "spare change" but I got something different. He rolled up on my car and said "You're pretty. If you want to come find me, I'll be under this tree." LOL! I couldn't believe this dude tried to have me come check him out under his tree.

But swag is swag. So that exchange put me on the path to getting back in the game. I had one hiccup with a gentleman that seemed to want to get in the game but then fumbled at the last minute. Still bewildered about that one but I press on. I have a plan to get back in the game but more about that later. Stay tuned...

Change and loss

2008-07-25T18:15:00.002-04:00

Well this has been an interesting year for me so far. The debauchery that I was hoping for has not materialized, however it has been a productive year for work. I just finished shooting the second season of Hell Date. I created a new blog called www.cluelessfashionista.com

Early this year I realized that I was ready to make some major changes in my life. One of those changes was being ready for a relationship but it has been slow going on that front. I figured out a long time ago that I can't control people but I can control my attitude towards them. I am working on being more open towards guys that I meet and am interested in. It didn't work out so well recently but I digress. I invited someone to be a part of my year of debauchery and he couldn't step up to the plate. His loss.

Something else I have had to deal with a lot this year is loss. Earlier this year, my grandfather passed away. He had been battling pancreatic cancer for a while and he couldn't keep fighting. I'm glad he's out of pain but I do miss him a lot. I also lost two of my high school classmates. One was a guy that was my basketball player when I was a cheerleader. When I was in high school, the cheerleaders were assigned a player during the season. We would decorate their lockers before the games and bring them donuts. As a basketball cheerleader, I had a girl basketball player and a guy basketball player. The second guy that passed away was a guy that I knew from around. He was a popular guy that I didn't really know knew who I was until one day after he had graduated (he was a year older than me), he saw me and spoke to me. He was cool ever since them. We even talked on myspace recently. It was sad when these guys died because they were so young and had so much of their lives ahead of them.

I've also had to deal with loss through my friends. One of my oldest friends lost her brother to a senseless act of violence very recently. One of my close friends lost her father as well. Although I didn't have direct relationships with their family members, I still feel their loss.

With all of this loss going on around me, I am realizing that I need to make every moment of my life count. I shouldn't sit on my heels and wait for someone to give me permission to do what makes me most happy. Neither should anyone else.

FB vs. FWB vs. Dating

2008-07-17T20:58:00.002-04:00

The other day I was talking to a good friend of mine. We were discussing her situation with this guy she's been seeing off and on for the past year or so. She had decided that maybe their situation wasn't progressing the way she would have liked so she was going to separate herself from him. Now as we all know, when you're dealing with someone, it can often take a couple of tries before you can completely walk away.

As we discussed their situation, it became very clear to me that what she hoped was a FB situation was more of a FWB situation. Ok, let me stop here and define some things for you.

FB: Fuck buddy-someone that you deal with on only a physical level. You are free to date people when in this situation.
FWB: Friend with Benefits-someone you hang out with and are friends with but every time you are together, things will get physical. You can date people in this situation.
Dating: When two people have a mutual interest in each other and getting to know more about each other. There can be a physical aspect or not. You may or may not be free to date other people, depending on the agreement you have with the other person.

Definitions over.

Well while talking to my friend, I realized that many people get these three situations confused and that often leads to issues between the sexes. There is definitely some overlap and gray area involved but if you are totally honest with yourself about your situation, you will figure out what you're involved in.

First clue, if you're calling it a situation, you aren't dating.

Determination and resilience

2008-07-09T17:55:00.003-04:00

Last Friday on July 4, I jogged the entire 6.2 miles of the 39th annual Peachtree Road Race held here in Atlanta. I think this is my 5th or 6th year participating in the race, however last year I was only able to complete 3.2 miles of the race. Now there are some people who can't even jog a mile so I won't belittle my ability to jog the 3.2 miles last year but each year that I participate in the Peachtree Road Race, I go in with the desire to jog the entire thing. Well this year, I did it! I was proud of myself because in spite of my extremely busy schedule, I managed to train well for the race.

I joined a gym where I've been taking kickboxing and this class called fast track at least twice a week and I jog twice a week. I feel better and I'm toning up nicely. Earlier this year, I made a decision to be healthier. Although I want to lose weight, I'm not focusing on the weight loss aspect. I'm focusing on eating better and being more active. It's been going well and I plan on keeping it up. I realize that being busy is not an excuse for being unhealthy. Besides, if you make exercise a part of your schedule, you won't' be too busy to do it.

Lack of respect can over power prejudice

2008-06-15T17:48:00.002-04:00

This past Friday at work was a long day for me. It was my first Friday shooting the TV show that I'm working on and it was the first time that I was angered beyond just frustration or annoyance while working on a TV show. There is a member of our crew that tends to be very goal oriented when we are shooting. Typically this is a good thing but in reality television, you have to be flexible because you are usually shooting in the "real world" as opposed to a totally created world like on some shows, typically scripted ones. When you are shooting a TV show in the "real world", you have lots of extra things to deal with, namely the "regular people" that will come into contact with the crew.

As one of the Location Producers for this show, I am extremely aware that we often incorporate "regular people" in our shows. I am also aware that these people can't be expected to become actors overnight. With that awareness, I do my best to thoroughly prepare them for what to expect when we arrive and begin shooting. A member of our crew isn't always so sensitive to this fact. This has been an ongoing issue but I am often able to keep the people from becoming upset or annoyed or frustrated, until Friday.

We were shooting at a location where the owner was an older gentleman. He was a feisty, opinionated, talkative guy. When this crew member arrived and attempted to direct this gentleman, he's wasn't the easiest to direct. Rather than taking the time to assess the entire situation, the crew member got really short and rude with the gentleman. This bothered me so I attempted to let him know that he didn't have to do anything he was uncomfortable doing, he flipped out in the worst way.

I knew that he was really more upset with her but that it was me that set him off. I worked with another crew member to calm him down and we were able to complete our task. I got really upset because the initial crew member was so rude and disrespectful to the gentleman. I felt like he was an elder and we should always do our best to respect our elders. It didn't help that the crew member was white and the gentleman was black. However, I didn't see a race issue, I saw a respect issue. The other sad part is that she was totally unaware of the role that she had played in things going the way they did.

Eventually I felt better and we still ended up wrapping fairly early. As I thought back on the days events, I realized one important thing. One of the reasons why I got so upset is because being around this 70-year-old man, made me think of my grandfather. Although he didn't act like my grandfather or even look like him, I just thought of him. I miss my grandfather and it really pissed me off to see someone be so disrespectful to someone who could be someone's grandfather. Once I made peace with that I was able to move past the anger.

Learning experiences come at the oddest times.

Alicia Keys' As I Am Tour

2008-06-01T20:44:00.003-04:00

Last Wednesday I had the opportunity to attend the Atlanta show of the "As I Am" tour featuring Alicia Keys, Ne-yo and Jordin Sparks.

It was an awesome show! Alicia Keys is a consummate performer and Ne-yo is electrifying on stage. I only saw the end of Jordin Sparks' show but she is a cutie pie and I look forward to seeing her grow as an artist. That girl can sang!

Ne-yo's performance was a story that told the tale of a love found and eventually lost using his songs to narrate. It was great because he sang all of his hits plus some great songs off of both of his albums. He started the show with his current single, "Closer" and kept the energy up throughout. He even sang my most favorite song from his second album, "Make it Work". He danced well and his dancers were great too. It was very Broadway-esque and his back up band also included a hype man. I've never seen an R&B singer with a hype man but it worked well for Ne-yo!

Alicia Keys came out and performed for about two hours straight. She gave great energy throughout. She sang her hits along with some songs from all three of her albums. She had wonderful dancers and she even did some steps herself. It was great hearing her sing the songs that made her famous like "Fallen" as well as some of my personal favorites from her first cd like "Goodbye".

If this concert tour is coming to your city, make sure you go check it out. It will be an enjoyable evening. Here's a link to the rest of the dates: http://www.aliciakeys.com/news/as-i-am-us-tour-dates-announced

Happy Birthday to Me!

2008-05-12T20:34:00.003-04:00

Last Tuesday was my birthday. I am and have always been a firm believer in celebrating the day you were born. I see nothing wrong with planning my own birthday outings and including all of my friends and associates to join in my birthday fun. This past birthday was no different. The weekend before my birthday my friends had put together a surprise birthday party that I thought was for my friend but it turned out to be a joint party for both of us. They had invited a stripper (which was more for my friend than me) but it was a great party because my oldest friends were there with my newer friends. It was wonderful to have all of my friends in one place at one party. Good times!

This pre-birthday party was capped off by a lovely dinner with my parents and cousin (who just recently moved down to Atlanta from St. Louis). So far my birthday was off to a great start.

More to come...

Bio vs Press Release

2008-04-27T17:45:00.002-04:00

Recently, I have had conversations with people about the difference between a bio and a press release. I feel like it's worth taking some time to explain the difference between the two and why both are important.

Bio-it is an account of a person's life. When someone has a professional bio written about them, it typically details their professional life with some personal details sprinkled in. Bios are informational pieces that set out to answer basic questions about a person or a company.

Press release-it is a document written as a way to garner interest in a person or a company. Press releases are often used to entice the media to write an article or to entice a company to consider a partnership with an organization or individual.

I have come to the realization that there are people out there that are practicing publicists that don't fully understand this differentiation. I do understand that you don't necessarily need a degree in PR to practice PR but if you don't have formal training, you should at least take the time to get practical insight into the basics of the field. There are tons of blogs, websites and books that have been written about the basics of public relations and how to practice it effectively.

Stay tuned for a list of blogs, websites and books that are great educational tools for those interested in working as PR practitioners and consultants as well as those who already work in the field.

Atlanta R&B Live featuring Ne-yo

2008-02-15T08:49:00.008-05:00

Wednesday (Feb. 13, 2008), I had the opportunity to attend the launch of an event called "Atlanta R&B Live". The featured artist was grammy-award winning Ne-yo and the opening act was Cheri Dennis. The event was held at Justin's and it was full of music industry tastemakers.

It was a very sexy event with a backdrop set up as you walk in where celebrities and other individuals were invited to take pictures and the entrance to Justin's was draped in white gauze. The event was sponsored by Hennessy and those who got tables were treated to a Hennessy tasting along with dinner. The performances were great. Cheri Dennis has a great voice and delivered a good performance. Her new single is a great dance song and I hope it does well. Check out her website and hear her new single.

Now I am a big fan of Ne-yo and his music. I have both of his cds and they are both on steady rotation in my car. I like his uptempo, midtempo and slow songs, which makes his cds very easy for me to listen to. I have wanted to see him live for quite some time now and it was a pleasure to finally have the opportunity to do so. He was very engaging live and sang some of my favorites from his current cd, Because of You. He also sang an unreleased single that peaked my interest in his next project. I am still a big fan of his and I can't wait to have the opportunity to see him in a big concert but this intimate setting was a great way to be introduced to him live. If you're not familiar with him, check out his website and m yspace page.

Overall the event was great and I look forward to attending more in the new series. As an avid R&B lover who wishes there was more good R&B out there, I look forward to everything this event has to offer. Below are some pictures from the event as taken by a photographer with All the Parties. Check out their website, www.alltheparties.com.

Cheri Dennis

Ne-Yo
Myself and Nicholas

Faatimah York of K'orus Wines and Ross . Get more information about K'orus Wines, check out their website: www.koruswine.com
It's a french wine company that makes wine more approachable for novices and experienced wine drinkers alike. It's also a company that is focused on targeting the African American consumer but everyone is invited to try K'orus Wines.

Dealing with loss

2008-02-12T22:13:00.002-05:00

So far 2008 has been a year of loss for me. I've experienced loss on a few different levels. I've experienced personal loss (the loss of my grandfather on January 27, 2008), professional loss and material loss (someone went into my car and took all of my car audio stuff with the exception of the factory radio February 9, 2008). Now the personal loss saddened me deeply and I will miss my grandfather but his passing marked a release for him because he was in a lot of pain. I just wish I had gotten the chance to spend more time with him growing up but I really enjoyed the time I did spend with him. He was a very colorful man and quite debonair.

Now my professional loss made me sad at first but I realized that it was for the best and that you can't always do business with friends. I'm just glad I made the decision to step away so that the friendship wouldn't suffer. I know I'm a different person when I'm doing business and sometimes friends don't understand the separation.

The material loss was more upsetting because someone went into my car as it sat in my driveway and took things out of it. Now I'm annoyed that I have to replace these things but I'm more disturbed at how unsafe I feel at my own home. I also lost my car key so I had to get the lock changed for my car's ignition (the cheapest option) to prevent the thief (who may have found the key) from coming back and driving away in my car.

Overall this period of loss has given me some perspective. It has definitely made me stronger and more comfortable allowing myself to be upset about things. Now I won't even begin to say that I have worked through it and am ready to move on. These losses will be with me for some time, but it hasn't erased my optimism. This is still the year for me to continue to move forward and build on the foundation I have been laying over the past couple of years.

Her name is Algebra

2008-01-21T15:07:00.000-05:00

This past Saturday I had the opportunity to attend a concert featuring Algebra and friends. Algebra is an R&B/Soul singer from Atlanta that has been making waves for the past few years. The show was PHENOMENAL! Algebra gave one of the best shows I've seen in a while.

I first learned about Algebra a couple of years ago when my business partner was doing some work with Kedar Entertainment South. At the time, Algebra was a new artist signed to Kedar Entertainment and I had the opportunity to see her perform at the Vibe Fest in Atlanta for the first time. It was a wonderful performance. Her lyrics are so personable and relatable that you feel like you are having a conversation with a girlfriend who just happens to be on stage with a full band.

After she opened the show, she allowed the audience to experience Rahbi. Rahbi was fabulous! His stage show was so entertaining and full of energy that the audience couldn't help but love him. Check him out online at: www.rahbimusic.com.

After Rahbi wowed the crowd, Malachi came out and gave us a taste of his music. I've seen Malachi perform in the past and I'm a big fan of his live performances. He has a soulful, hip hop vibe that draws you in when he performs. Check out his website: www.hustlinboy.com.

Once Malachi performed, one of Algebra's background singers stepped to the forefront and rocked the house. Erica Smith had so much energy that I'm now a fan of hers too. I love it when R&B/Soul singers have a rock edge. As soon as I find her myspace or website, I will share it with you.

After Erica, we had a nice surprise. Grammy winning songwriter/producer Bryan-Michael Cox got on stage and performed some of hits for us. We all know him as a great producer and songwriter but I had no idea he was a singer. Well he added an extra dimension to the show, if that was even possible.

Once we were so full of great music and even greater performances, Algebra came back out and performed several more songs. She sang with her band and did an acoustic set with just her and a guitar that was awesome. Then she blessed us with good news that her album will be out Feb. 26. I'm quite excited because I've been waiting for an album from her ever since I first saw her perform at the Vibe Fest in 2005.

If you ever get the chance the see Algebra perform live, don't sleep on it. Jump at the opportunity. You won't regret it. In the meantime, check out her myspace page: www.myspace.com/algebrablessett.

Holy Hip Hop!

2008-01-20T22:04:00.000-05:00

Friday, January 18, I had the opportunity to attend the 2008 Holy Hip Hop Artist Showcase at Center Stage at the CW Megaplex in Atlanta. I was there to support an artist I've been working with for the past couple of years, Tigah and an artist I just started working with, Credo Clay.

Both Tigah and Credo Clay are talented rap artists that are a part of the record label owned by my business partner, Troy and Tigah, called Solomon Sheppard Music. They are rappers that talk about God and good, clean living in their rhymes. For more information about Tigah, visit his myspace page at www.myspace.com/tigahtraxx For more information about Credo Clay, visit his myspace page at www.myspace.com/credoclay.

The showcase was very interesting. I haven't been able to really get into gospel or inspirational rap music because it tends to sound very watered down to me, but I do like Tigah and Credo's music. When I went to the showcase, I had high hopes that it would be an interesting and uplifting event.

Unfortunately it wasn't. Although Tigah and Credo did very well in their performances, the other artists confused me a bit. As we walked into Center Stage, I heard the chorus to a song that was really popular in the clubs over a year ago. This bothered me because as the night progressed I noticed a trend. A lot of the artists were simply "converting" secular rap songs and making them gospel rap songs. Not only did this make me cringe due to the limit it put on creativity, but some of the songs they were "converting" were not great songs to "gospelize".

Also the showcase felt like any other type of showcase that I've attended that wasn't for holy hip hop, only without the noticeable smell of smoke and drinking. While I appreciate the spirit of holy hip hop and gospel rap, I would prefer the artists make more of an effort to truly create good, clean rap music without feeling the need to "convert" popular secular songs by changing certain words. Overall it was an event that I would encourage more people to check out. More people should be aware that not all hip hop music is about money, sex, partying and loose women. Now don't get me wrong, Holy Hip Hop is a good concept and a great way to broaden the scope of hip hop and rap music, so read up on it. Besides, its a great way for young kids to experience hip hop and rap music with their parents blessing and clean lyrics.

For more information about Solomon Sheppard Music and the Truth Music Movement, check out the website www.solomonsheppardmusic.com.

For more information about Holy Hip Hop, check out the website www.holyhiphop.com

AVN 2008

2008-01-16T21:21:00.000-05:00

Well last week I went to Vegas and attended the AVN Expo, otherwise known as the Porn Convention. It was an interesting event to say the least. I went with a couple of business associates of mine who have an adult t-shirt line. We wanted to go and promote the t-shirts while making contacts with people who work in the adult entertainment industry. It was my first time attending an event like that. I've seen them on HBO in the past (remember the series, Real Sex) but never actually attended. Overall it was an enjoyable outing. I got some direct insight into the adult entertainment industry and the people at the event really responded well to the shirts. Here are some pictures from the event:

Check out the shirts and if you like them, keep checking back for updates. The website should be up and running soon. I will post an announcement then and shirts will be available for purchase on the website.

Unfortunately this trip didn't really qualify as debauchery for me due to the lack of partying and dancing but I plan on remedying that on my next trip to Vegas, tentatively scheduled for April. And now I rest...

And so it begins...

2008-01-06T20:54:00.001-05:00

So far 2008 has gone well for me. I've been taking things easy and resting a lot in preparation for the whirlwind of a year that is ahead of me. Over the weekend I celebrated the first of a year full of big birthdays. It was fairly low key but the birthday girl had a lot of fun so I'm happy because of it.

I have a lot of things that I prepared for in 2007 that I plan on executing in 2008, both professionally and personally. I'm excited as the year lays out ahead of me but I know it will require a lot of work and take a lot of energy so I want to keep the need for rest in mind.

Next week, I'm going to Las Vegas with two of my business partners at M.Blush Apparel. We're going to the adult entertainment convention to network and build some contacts for our burgeoning adult t-shirt line. I will share all of the details of our adventures in Vegas and post some pictures of our t-shirt line when I return.

It's 2008!

2008-01-03T14:41:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year!

As 2008 comes rolling in, I am optimistic. I haven't written in a while but it was for good reason. I had the opportunity to work on two television shows. One was called Dallas Austin presents: Drumroll. It was a reality show that followed students in the marching band at Southwest Dekalb High School in Decatur, Ga. It was my first experience in a reality setting of that sort. Before that I had only worked on American Idol which is much more confined to one space. This show entailed following the kids around at school, home, out to dinner, at games, etc. It was tiring but interesting. I learned a lot about directing the camera and what's most effective in creating an interesting reality show.

The second show I worked on was called "Brutha". That's actually a working title and I'm not sure what the final title is yet. It was a show about an up and coming R&B group. They are a group of brothers who can sing, dance, perform and charm the ladies. They just got signed to Def Jam and are being touted as the next Jackson 5. I can agree because the guys are very likable and talented.

Both shows were being shot for Peachtree TV, a local TBS affiliate. Drumroll aired and received a great response. Brutha hasn't aired yet but I will post an announcement when its scheduled to air.

Now I'm resting up some before things kick in again. I plan on having quite a few adventures this year. I've dubbed 2008 as "The Year of Debauchery". This is a big birthday year for me and I plan on celebrating all year. I will be back more regularly to share my professional and personal adventures with you.

Stay tuned...

American Idol Season 7

2007-10-13T13:42:00.000-04:00

Last week Monday through Wednesday (10-8 thru 10-10), I had the opportunity to work as a production assistant on the second round auditions of American Idol Season 7. It was a very interesting experience and I met a lot of really interesting people.

I also worked on the round one auditions that were held in August. It was really cool and sometimes disturbing to see the different people (thousands) that came to the Georgia Dome to throw caution to the wind for a chance on American Idol. Then when I was called back to assist with the second round auditions, I got to see what can happen when someone is encouraged to follow their dream. I also got to see that the whole process of auditioning for American Idol takes commitment and guts, whether you can really sing or not.

I learned a whole lot on the set of American Idol Season 7 and although we typically work long hours, it's a great experience. In addition to my work as a public relations consultant, I also work as a production assistant and eventually want to produce films. Right now my film experience is on the job training. The life of a PA is a humbling and growing experience that is not for everyone. Watching reality shows is addictive and I think working on them can be equally addictive because there is an element of realness to them. It's interesting to see real people transformed from everyday joes (who tend to be really attractive), to reality stars who become almost immediately untouchable. I am going to look into working on some more reality shows and share my adventures as a PA with you.

If you or anyone you know is interested in being on a reality show and would like tips on how to really stand out, check out this blog castinginatl.blogspot.com.
The blog is written by a lady that I worked with on American Idol and she has worked on reality shows and in casting for a few years. She has a lot of insight about reality shows and what casting directors want.

Adam Zyo Fashions

2007-10-12T19:37:00.000-04:00

Last Saturday (10-6) I had the opportunity to attend the Adam Zyo (pronounced Zee-Yo) fashion show at Fever Nightclub. Initially I wondered how a fashion show in a club would go over but when I got there and saw the setup, it made total sense. Fever Nightclub is a great club venue for a fashion show because they set up an actual runway in the bottom level of the club. It was a little short in my opinion but nice, black and sparkling. Overall the setup was really cool.

The show was also well done. The models looked model-esque and you could tell that the designer really put a lot into it with hair and makeup. The show was mostly showcasing men's suits and jackets on the male and female models. I really liked the suits because they could be worn right off the runway into an office. They were cut well and simple but elegant. I like a man in a good suit and these were good suits.

Check out Adam Zyo's website at www.adamzyo.com. He also does women's clothes as well.

Atlantis Music Conference Wrap Up

2007-09-24T19:49:00.000-04:00

Well...last week I participated in the Atlantis Music Conference held yearly in Atlanta. I had the opportunity to attend some very informative panels/seminars. One of which was about how to market an artist via the internet. It was very informative, however I was deeply disturbed at the audience make up.

Now the Atlantis Music Conference is one that caters to independent artists in the rock and hip hop arenas mostly so the people attending the event are usually a mix of independent hip hop artists and their camps and indie rock bands and their people. Well in this particular panel, which was very informative, the audience was made up mostly of rock and roll bands. When I glanced around the room, I saw maybe 8 black people and only four or five of them were hip hop artists. It was disappointing to say the least. I hope that more hip hop and r&b artists take the time to learn about the power of the internet and how the web can advance their career.

Other than that the event was pretty good. An artist that is a part of the Renea Solomon Group family, Tigah performed at the Saturday night showcase held at Sugar Hill. He did an excellent job and his message was definitely received by those in the audience that night. Check out his website for more information about Tigah, Solomon Sheppard Music and the Truth Music Movement.

Music all around!!

2007-08-07T20:29:00.000-04:00

The past few days have been full of great music for me. This past Thursday night (8-2-07), I had the opportunity to see the Rock the Bells concert at HiFi Buys Amphitheater. Well actually I was working at the show. I work at HiFi Buys every summer as a server for the box seats. It's a great way to see concerts and shows that I wouldn't normally go to. I've seen Jimmy Buffet, Mudvayne, Poison, Dave Matthews Band, 311, Kenny Chesney and many more other artists.

Well last Thursday I got a chance to see the lineup that consisted of Jedi Mind Tricks, Immortal Technique, David Banner, Pharoahe Monche, Talib Kweli, Mos Def, Nas, Erykah Badu and the Wu-Tang Clan. It was a great show. Now I must qualify this by saying that I'm not a huge hip hop person. Like I told someone at the show, I'm an "R&B chick" but since I started working with my business partner and other die hard hip hop heads, I have become much more aware of hip hop. I love a great lyricist almost as much as I love a great singer. I was honored to have the opportunity to experience the Rock the Bells festival. It was cool to see Talib Kweli and Mos Def perform as Black Star. And Nas was definitely great to watch. I can see why he has the fan base that he does. He has so much charisma. I only got to see a few minutes of the Wu-Tang Clan but it was great to see a large group of rappers on stage and understand everyone clearly.

Now on Saturday I had the opportunity to work at the Flashback Festival. I always try to work that festival whenever I get the chance because there are always some old school groups that I would like to see. This year I was excited at the opportunity to see Stephanie Mills. I made it a point to stay after I was done working to sit and watch her do her thing. I got to hear her sing two of my favorites ballads of all time, "I Have Learned to Respect the Power of Love" and "Home". Like I said before, I'm an "R&B chick" who listened to a lot of her parent's music growing up so I am a fan of Jeffrey Osborne, Billy Ocean, Rene and Angela, Stephanie Mills, Klymaxx and many more. My Sirius radio is more often on the easy listening stations than anything.

If you have the chance, check out the Rock the Bells festival. Here is the website: www.rockthebells.net

Charm School Reunion-my thoughts

2007-07-09T01:05:00.001-04:00

I just finished watching the Charm School Reunion on VH1. In case you don't watch that type of television, let me give you some background info.

Flavor of Love was a VERY popular VH1 show based on 80's hip hop icon Flavor Flav finding a special woman to spend his time with. Now Flav is known to be a bit of a charmer and that is evidenced by the many children he has by many different women. Well after his popular run on the Vh1 show, The Surreal Life, where he had a very public relationship with another 80's star, Brigitte Nielsen, the network decided to capitalize on their popularity and created a show centered around them called Strange Love. Well during the filming of that show, the couple ended things because of their intense jealously and constant arguing. I suppose VH1 saw that Flav was so well-received that they decided to create a Bachelor style show with Flav as the lonely bachelor seeking companionship.

Now because Flav is who he is, it was pretty much guaranteed that he was not going to attract the model type of women that The Bachelor attracted. He did however manage to attract strippers, porn stars and other very extreme type of women. The women alone on the show were interesting to watch, however what was more interesting (disturbing) to watch was Flav's interaction with these women. He took full advantage of having a bevy of twenty-somethings all competing for his (and the camera's) attention by groping, feeling, touching and open mouth kissing these women any chance he got. It was often quite stomach turning to watch him shove his tongue down these women's throats on a regular basis. I'm not opposed to seeing people enjoy each other's company but I don't want to see anyone almost licking someone else's face and calling it a kiss. Eww..

Ok, I digress. Well after the first season of Flavor of Love, Flav was left alone so VH1 decided to have a second season of the show. Comedian Monique and her production company was apparently watching the two seasons of Flavor of Love in total disgust. She decided to create a show called Flavor of Love Girls: Charm School and invite some of the Flavor of Love contestants to attend her charm school and come out more self respecting women. The grand prize was $50,000. Well the winner Saaphyri was really deserving and she looked great on the reunion show. What spurred me to write this blog was something that happened between Larissa and Monique.

...stepping onto my soapbox...

Larissa was a very outspoken and volatile person on all of the shows. She was expelled in Episode 7 because she tried to win at any cost, even attempting to throw her friend under the bus for something that they both did. Well she came on the reunion show and was very angry and disrespectful toward Monique and her "friend" Shay. What upset me was that her mother was there but she didn't seem to be stepping up to the plate to be a mother to Larissa. Monique got so upset at Larissa that she approached her in an almost threatening way and Larissa's mother was quick to get in Monique's face but she had nothing to say about the way Larissa was acting.

I was amazed. Why is it that someone outside of her family is trying so hard to bring out the best in Larissa? Why wasn't her mother doing that? Why did her mother allow her to be on national television making a fool out of herself and being the stereotypical "angry, ghetto" black women that she was portraying herself to be? I am hoping that Larissa's mother is going to step up her game and push her to be more of a lady and not take to manipulation and disrespect to get her point across. I also hope that what we saw on the show was only half the story and that Larissa's mom is really a much stronger woman and is working to push Larissa to be the best woman she can become. Watching that interaction just made me super glad that my mom was such a great role model for me growing up. She showed me how to work on being the best woman I can be through her triumphs and through her mistakes. I wish that more women could have that influence from a woman in their life.

...stepping down from my soapbox...

Goodnight.

Consciously seeking wealth

2007-06-23T13:14:00.000-04:00

Well I have been working as a full time consultant for a little over a month. It's been a struggle but I knew it would be. However I made a conscious decision that I was on a journey to acquiring wealth. I got an article from a yahoo group I belong to that speaks strongly to strengthening my journey for wealth acquisition. I thought I'd share it with you so you can take the words with you as well.

Saving Money and Building Wealth:
Wealth Consciousness

Here is a secret to building wealth: before you ever accumulate any substantial sum of money you must gain a wealth consciousness.

What is “wealth consciousness”? It is a consciousness of abundance that recognizes that you deserve wealth and financial rewards in life just for being you. It is a fundamental law of the universe that if you don’t think you deserve something then you will most certainly not get it. You must first of all recognize that you deserve something before you will ever receive it.

Those who have it in the back of their mind that they don’t deserve money or that money is evil will most certainly find that circumstances dictate that they will experience financial lack regardless of their talent, opportunities and experience. Even if you find this hard to believe, it is hard to argue with the fact that a negative attitude, in and of itself, creates problems of its own. And having a poverty consciousness certainly qualifies as a bad attitude in the realm of finances.

Poverty consciousness is the opposite of wealth consciousness. Poverty consciousness focuses on lack and the fact that ones needs are never met. This belief system is the fundamental reason that most people do not accumulate wealth. Therefore when they do get money they act like they will never get it again and thus spend it all at one time rather than accumulating it. How much money you make has no bearing if you can accumulate wealth, believe it or not. There are people making incomes twice the median average who still do not accumulate wealth and then there are people making the median income who are able to accumulate wealth. One has wealth consciousness and one does not. It is simple as that.

Click here to read the rest of the article.

Trunk Show!

2007-06-16T22:55:00.000-04:00

Thursday night I went to the Innovative Creators Trunk Show hosted by Icon Style. It was a trunk show suite featuring clothing and accessories by Dareales, Layla K Designs, Madame DuJour, RMax Clothing and Diva Dezine jewelry, among others. It was an eclectic and interesting mix of people and I enjoyed the networking and the wonderful clothing and accessory designs. I will definitely be visiting their respective websites to add to my collection soon.

I also had the opportunity to finally meet and chat with Ms. Layla K. owner of Layla K. Designs, Madame DuJour, Fuschya Models and The Couture Connoisseur Fashion Network. Whew! She is one busy lady. She is also the writer of a fabulous fashion blog "One Haute Chic". Check it out, One Haute Chic. She is also the Executive Director of Hautelanta Fashion Week which will be held September 19-23 in Atlanta. Check out the website for Hautelanta Fashion Week.

Stay tuned for more information on my event with will be also happening during Hautelanta Fashion Week called Fashion House. For more information about the organization creating Fashion House, check out the myspace page for Elan Fashion Inc.

Welcome to Parish Nation!

2007-06-14T01:19:00.000-04:00

Yesterday night I went to a happy hour event that featured the new line by Parish Nation. It's a men's clothing line that is for the fashionable man who likes to stand out without looking like he is trying to hard. The line is quite versatile. One of the models was wearing a fresh pair of white Air Force Ones and one of the others was wearing nice black dress shoes. Both pairs of shoes looked hot with the clothes. I especially loved the colorful stitching on the jeans.

Check out their website: www.parish-nation.com. If you know any fashion forward men who like to stand out with little effort, this is definitely the clothing line for him.

Hood Hard Day!

2007-05-25T08:48:00.001-04:00

Last night I attended the first Hood Hard Day held at the Atrium in Stone Mountain, Ga. It was an interesting event and although the concert started about an hour late, once it started it was off and running. I really appreciated the fact that the organizers (DJ Aaries, Isis of Word on the Streetz Magazine) had a stage manager (Kim Ellis of KE Consulting) who kept the show going steadily all night.

I'm not what you would consider a "hood" type of person by any means but there were some good acts that performed last night. One group that stood out was a group from the midwest called Thorobread (I hope I spelled that right) and another female duo called Two Tone (I hope I spelled that right). Although in both groups there was a definite stand out member, both held their own on the stage and kept my attention.

Overall, I would say that the Hood Hard Day concert was put together ok and ran fairly smoothly from my vantage point. I was pleased enough with the event that I spoke to my business partner first thing this morning about working on getting things set up so that our artist, Don Dolla (click his name to check out his myspace page) can perform at the next Hood Hard Day.

For more information, check out the website: www.hoodhardday.com

And the winner is...

2007-05-24T09:35:00.000-04:00

Jordin Sparks!

Although I haven't been an avid American Idol watcher since Ruben Studdard won but I always keep my eye on the show to see how things progress. As it got down to the wire, I was an avid Jordin Sparks fan. She is gorgeous, likeable and has a wonderful voice. Blake felt too much like a gimmick to me and his beatboxing schtick would wear out after a while.

Yaaa! for Jordin.

The Cha Cha Diva wins!!

2007-05-17T09:06:00.000-04:00

I have been an avid watcher of America's Next Top Model since cycle 1 when Adrienne went from ugly duckling to winner. I cheered loudly when Eva became the first black woman to win ANTM. Now I am cheering just as loudly now that Jaslene has become the first latina woman to win. Not only did she do that, but she was turned away in cycle 7 only to come back and win the whole damn thing.

Go Cha Cha Diva!

On to step two...

2007-05-10T12:39:00.000-04:00

Well the time has come. Tomorrow is my last day at my part time day gig at SunTrust. So now I'm going to be flying without a safety net. But things have been going really well since then.

The modeling/talent agency I went to wants to represent me so I can go fully into that situation now. I have garnered two clients that I am currently doing PR consulting for.

http://www.winchelupperclassmen.com

http://www.mondaymover.com

Things are going well for the fashion event in September. It's called Fashion House and we are getting a great response for it already without even having to do much promotion as of yet.

I'm feeling very optimistic about everything. It really feels like this is a great time to make the move that I am making.

I will be detailing my adventures as a full time entrepreneur on here. They should be pretty interesting because my new itinerary also includes doing a lot more traveling. Since I don't have to take "time off" per say, I can hop in my car and see the sites and the people in other cities. I'm excited!

Commitment is hard...

2007-05-02T09:59:00.000-04:00

Well I've finally done it. I put my two week notice at my part time "day gig" and I am pushing forward with building my "side" business to be my main business. I have two clients that I am actively working with and a couple of other ones I'm preparing proposals for. Stay tuned...

I am also working on a fashion event that will be held in September during Hautelanta.Fashion Week. It's a series of panels and seminars punctuated by a fashion exhibit and fashion show. We are focused on putting the spotlight on the Atlanta fashion scene. It's a small scene that is growing. We are also focused on educating people about the different aspects of the fashion industry. It's going to be a wonderful event that will show the world that Atlanta does have its own unique fashion element. Stay tuned...

Overall, things are going really well. I feel like my timing has been really good and should work out really well in the long run. I also heard back from the talent agency I went to and they are interested in representing me. So adventures in prettyville will indeed continue. Definitely stay tuned...

There's a lot to check back for so keep coming back!

Confidence is key

2007-04-25T12:33:00.000-04:00

As time approaches for me to make a huge leap, I am struggling to maintain my confidence. I have had some professional experiences that have shown me that I am indeed making the right decision.

I want to say thanks to my new clients/partners: Winchel's Upperclassmen Barber Spa (if any of you guys are in Atlanta, check him out. His website is www.winchelupperclassmen.com) and Felecia Hatcher of FeleciaFlair PR. We are working on a website project as well, www.mondaymover.com. Check it out and sign up for the weekly email. It's full of great inspirational tidbits as well as professional development information that anyone can benefit from.

I'm full of optimism and hope right now. It's a lovely day!

Change is indeed scary...

2007-04-24T12:07:00.000-04:00

I set a very strict short term goal for myself that is quickly approaching (the end of this week!) and I'm becoming nervous. I am working hard to properly plan things out so that I won't be scrambling to recover but things haven't happened quite as planned.

However, I still think I need to move forward as planned. Stay tuned...

Right now I am working with a group of people to create an event that will be held during Hautelanta.Fashion Week here in Atlanta in September. Keep checking back for updates. More information coming soon.

Changes

2007-04-04T10:02:00.000-04:00

Well it's been a week and I still haven't heard from the agency I visited last week. I think I will reach out this afternoon and see where I stand. So stay tuned...

But this time I'm thinking about business. I have been working with a start up company since the end of last year and I'm starting to feel less than confident in the company's owner/founder. He doesn't seem to have a clear understanding of how to run a business and he has an even less clear understanding of what the people who are working with him actually do. When he initially brought the idea of the company to me, he told me that he wanted a comprehensive media campaign nationwide and eventually worldwide. When I brought up the idea of me assisting in other public relations areas since my skillset goes beyond just media relations, he insisted that I play that one position. He said that he needed everyone to do one thing really well rather than getting bogged down by other duties.

So I said fine. I would focus on getting media for the company but at the time, everything wasn't ready for media scrutiny. So I started getting things prepped and ready for when things came together. Well time passed and problems started arising with the other team members. Things weren't getting done and the company became stagnant. Well at the outset, I thought it was such a great idea that I reached out to a couple of friends of mine who I knew would be assets to the company. One of my friends began working really closely with the head of the company. After things went stagnant, he was instrumental in getting them going again.

But more problems arose and the company still isn't ready. So now I'm in an interesting position. Do I stick around and wait it out to see if the company head will get things together while the idea is still somewhat viable? Or do I walk away from the situation completely?

I'm not sure what I'm going to do at this point. I have set a very strict short term goal for myself and I have to keep all things in proper perspective. Stay tuned...

They say change is good but it is also a bit nerve wracking as well.

Today is the day! adventures in prettyville continued...

2007-03-28T10:22:00.000-04:00

Well today is the day. I am headed over to a modeling agency after I get off of work to take some snapshots. I'm quite curious as to how it will turn out. I feel pretty cute today so that should definitely translate through the camera. This could be another venture for me to get into. It would be pretty cool to be working as a model. I've always had an interest in fashion and with my newfound interest in being in front of the camera, this is a great way to learn more about that side of the fashion industry. It's cool how this experience could lead to making me a better producer overall.

Well I will keep you posted about how things go. Wish me luck!

You want me to do what?!?!

2007-03-23T17:13:00.000-04:00

The other day I was talking to this guy I know. He is an attractive guy with a couple of different companies doing his thing. I had to know why he was single. Of course he said it was by choice. He told me that he wasn't really looking for a relationship right now. So I asked him whether he had a shortage of female companionship.

"Oh no!" was his reply. He said that he likes to have fun and if a woman understands that then it's all cool. Now I couldn't help but respect him for that because I've run across quite a few guys who feel the same way but they don't have the balls to come right out and say it.

Now this is what got me.

Within the same conversation he asked me if I liked to cook. I hesitated because I've found that many guys (especially here in the South) use that as a judgment type question. I tend to be negatively judged because I'm not the domestic type and I don't have a problem saying that. There's no need for me to pretend to be something I'm not. Now don't get me wrong, I will take care of the people in my life (just ask anyone close to me) but I'm not the woman eagerly waiting for her husband and kids to cook for and clean up after.

So when he asked me about my cooking skills, my first thought was WTF? You want to know if I would cook a meal for you right after you just said that you only want to offer a woman "fun" because you don't have time for much else.

How is it that he could do that with a straight face? The double standard in that statement alone was interesting to me. In one instance you can't help but appreciate his honesty and in another you can't help but be a little unnerved at his nerve.

It's so crazy to me...

master cleanse!

2007-03-23T12:57:00.000-04:00

All I can say about that is Ugh!

I attempted to cleanse my body and prepare it for better eating by using the Master Cleanse. It's an old concept that Beyonce just recently made famous. She did it for 10 days and lost 20 pounds before she did Dreamgirls, which is why she looked so skinny. Well I decided to do it as a way to cleanse my system. I only planned to do it for 5 days.

Well last weekend I bought all of the necessary ingredients: lemons, grade B maple syrup, water, cayenne pepper and an herbal tea with senna in it. I planned on doing it this weekend.

Last night I mixed all of the ingredients together per the instructions. I tasted a small amount of it and although it tasted bad, I figured I could deal with it. I made myself a cup of the tea and went off to bed, hungry.

When I woke up this morning, I was ready to go forward with my cleanse. I went to the kitchen and got one of my bottles of the concoction to start drinking. The stuff tasted much worse than I remembered. I figured I could make it work so I kept drinking it. The more I drank, the worse I felt. It made me sick to my stomach after only drinking a little so I decided to abort the cleanse.

I poured all of that crap down the sink and got me some fruit to eat. I will rembark on my master cleanse experience again in the near future but with some modifications. I will tell that tale when the time comes. Right now I guess I will just work out over the weekend to prep for my foray into plus modeling.

Adventures in prettyville

2007-03-20T14:15:00.000-04:00

Well I am about to start on a new adventure. I've always been interested in being in front of the camera. I've debated about trying either acting or modeling. Well I have been doing some research on plus modeling and I think I could be a good candidate for commercial/catalog plus modeling. Standing at 5'5 with no shoes on, I don't fit the qualifications for a high fashion plus model but I could still shoot for other work. So, next Wednesday I'm going to an agency that's currently looking for plus models to take some snapshots.

Wish me luck.

I've always thought it would be fun to enter into modeling but I would much rather have an agent to work with rather than doing it on my own. I will be keeping you guys posted on how things go. Let's hope that next Wednesday isn't my first and last foray into the world of plus modeling.

I can do it.

Education is key...

2007-03-13T13:20:00.000-04:00

The more I work in the industry of music and entertainment, the more I realize that the most important thing people are lacking is education.

It really interests me how lots of industries make their money off of people not knowing. The music industry used to be such industry but as times change, it is becoming more and more apparent that educating people really can make things more profitable.

Consider this, if more people knew about real estate and the most appropriate way to go about purchasing and refinancing a house, maybe the real estate market would be better off because the foreclosure rate would be lower. What about the banking industry? Don't you think that banks might make more interest or fee income off of more saavy consumers? Because although overdraft fees are $32 to $35 for most banks, that fee often comes with a price to the bank in the end because the customer doesn't have any money in their account. We all know that the customers with the highest balances get the best treatment so why not educate people to get and keep those balances high?

The same goes for the music industry. Although there are record label execs who've made huge profits off of artists not having enough knowledge, I'm sure those companies could stand to make a bigger more long term profit off of artists who actually understand the business of music. With this in mind I am working on a couple of projects that will help to actually empower the artists and give them basic knowledge so that they can move confidentally into their business dealings.

Knowledge is power but using that knowledge to further positive action is more powerful.

new artist to watch-Lily Allen!!

2007-03-12T09:43:00.000-04:00

I'm an ecletic person. When it comes to music, I will play anything from Danity Kane to Jay-Z within one car trip. I can truly say that I like all types of music. If it appeals to my senses, I will listen to it and sing along if I learn the words.

Well the other day I was watching videos getting caught up on what's new and considered hot by BET, VH1 and MTV's standards and I saw a video by this new artist, Lily Allen. I've been hearing her song on the radio for a while now and I like it because it's catchy and cute but after seeing the video, I'm sold on it.

I love how her video was so unapologetic about things that I'm sure many women want to do after a breakup but don't have the guts to do. The funny thing is that I read about her in Jane Magazine and that made me pay more attention to her as well. Jane Magazine is often unapologetic about covering all aspects of women's thoughts and lives so them writing an article about Lily Allen definitely gave her some "street cred" in my eyes.

I encourage women to check her out. People are so afraid to be completely honest about how they feel and want to react to things. This song is just one small example of how refreshing it is to own your feelings even if they may not be the most user friendly to others.

Go Lily Allen!!

Frustration

2007-03-03T12:47:00.000-05:00

I have been working really hard to build my client list. I've had several opportunities presented to me and many of them have not panned out. It's hard to work with people who may or may not truly understand how business works especially if my sole role is to publicize or promote their product or service. I guess since I also do business consulting and run my own business, I have some knowledge about running and setting up a business. It sometimes bothers me to see someone with an awesome idea and concept that can be quite profitable let it get away because of lack of humility or lack of experience.

Creating a company can be a humbling learning experience that teaches you patience and perseverance all at the same time. Everyone isn't supposed to be a business owner. Some people are great at providing the ideas and others are great at executing those ideas. There are even fewer people who are great at providing and executing ideas.

When I tell people that I have my own company, they look at me all impressed. They tend to think it's cool that I work for myself but what they don't know is that I work almost around the clock. I hardly ever get time off and I am always on call but I also have to fully understand my strengths and weaknesses.

That's what has me so frustrated dealing with some people. They refuse to accept where they are weak and allow someone else to assist. No one man is an island. No one woman can do it all. Understanding that one fact is essential. Before you even make the move to figure out what you want to name your company, you need to understand that.

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

2007-02-14T11:42:00.000-05:00

I'm sure there will be plenty of blogs about today. Some people will blog about love lost. Others will blog about the commercialization of the day and then some people will blog about how they hate this day.

I'm really indifferent to it one way or the other. I can remember only a couple of times that I actually had a Valentine on V-day (and two of those times were when I was in elementary school). Any other time I've been single. Sometimes woefully single other times powerfully single.

This year I'm just single. Now don't get me wrong. I am a romantic at heart and it would be sweet and lovely if the person who had my heart would take the time out to do something extra special today but alas he does not believe in the holiday and I am left to presume that my desires are not pressing enough to make him step outside of himself. I suppose that's why I'm still single...Oh well different discussion, different day.

All in all, I just want to wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day. Make this and every other day as special as it can be for you. I know I will be enjoying my bottle of cheap, yet tasty bubbly tonight.

Impressions

2007-02-07T10:47:00.000-05:00

It always amazes me how people perceive things. One major moment in the life of one person can be yet another daily occurence in another person's.

The other day I was talking to a friend of mine and he made a reference to another individual that he'd had a run in with while in college (5+ years ago) and he mentioned not liking that person. Well time had come where he was going to have to interact with this person again and he was dreading it. Funny thing, he met up with the person and their interaction was cool. In fact, the other person didn't even seem to remember the incident.

It's crazy how we as people make things in life much more than they should be or need to be. I met a good friend of someone I'm close to and she said something that I keep in mind often. She said "Don't take things so personal." Now when she said it at the time I didn't fully get it but as time passed, I started to get it more and more. What she basically meant was "It's not always about you."

I agree.

If you think about it, people are so self absorbed that most of the time they're so busy thinking about themselves that they didn't even notice what you did. Or if they did notice, they won't necessarily remember it unless it had some major impact on them. I think we would all breathe easier if we remembered that. "It's not always about you."

Interesting concept.

Can a girl get a break?

2007-02-06T10:14:00.000-05:00

Goodness...it truly is hard out there for a pimp...

Late last year I decided that I wanted to focus more on my public relations skills and bringing in more PR clients. I'm very choosy about who I work with, especially as I make a name for myself as someone who does PR in the entertainment (music) industry. I enjoy working with people who deserve publicity and promotion and helping them get it. I don't mind working hard and I'm confident in my skillset as a PR person but it's hard to get clients.

I've reached out to people who have said that they need PR work but I get no response. It can be frustrating at times. Now I can admit that I am working on a major project that will definitely pan out financially if we can get all of the necessary components working. (Stay tuned for that one...) but I want to work with at least two other clients to solidify my client goals.

Keep your fingers crossed for me as I keep pushing forward. This is yet another thing that is teaching me the patience that I understand is necessary for growth.

Now on a personal note, I am not doing so well in that department. I am so delighted that I was able to enjoy the experience of being truly in love and while things haven't panned out as I had hoped, I still have a special place in my heart for him. He is dealing with some major stress right now and some people aren't the easiest to be close to when they're stressed out. I understand that but it is hurtful at times when he acts out due to stress so I just work to be understanding and step away from things when I feel like I'm starting to react negatively.

Goodness this patience thing covers all relationships, business and personal. Boy the life lessons never stop!

The cost of doing business

2007-02-05T09:58:00.000-05:00

When I initially decided that entrepreneurship was the best route for me to go I knew that it would take some time before I was financially stable and able to work solely on my business endeavors without having to maintain a "real job" . With that in mind I began to work on creating a name for myself as a public relations person and manager so that I could drum up business as a consultant. I work hard, really hard. I have a part time "real job" that helps pay my bills and gives me health, dental and vision insurance and when I'm not there I'm working hard at building my client base as a consultant.

I always figured I would come across fakers and other people who weren't in a good place to handle good business but I never thought that I would work with or attempt to work with people who would go as far as to sign contracts and put things in place only to let the business lapse. I suppose I was naive when I figured that filling out paperwork and agreements was enough to ensure that a person would at least attempt to handle business.

I was wrong. I guess I gave people too much credit but I've found that becoming angry and jaded isn't the answer either. I will just work on maintaining my optimism and finding positive people to work with. People who honor their commitments and stand by their word because it's important to them. I still see the glass as half full.

Live your life...don't let your life live you

2007-01-15T09:45:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year!!!

I know that its been sometime since I blogged. Life has been quite busy. I finally got the chance to go to New York for a few days. I really enjoyed being there and exploring the city. I met some cool new people and got a chance to reconnect with someone from my past. I am convinced that I need to be up there right now. I'm working on it and there will definitely be some interesting blogs about my adventures or mis-adventures.

With all of my time being spent offline and dealing with people, I noticed a disturbing trend. Many people allow themselves to become victims of their own lives and situations. I have had conversations with friends and family members who would complain about things in their lives but when I asked them if they have tried to change the situation I get lots of excuses about why they can't. It amazes me because if I ever have a problem with my situation I make moves to change it. If I can't change anything but my role in it, I will do that.

I just wish that more people would take an active role in their own destinies. Yes there are those that believe that no matter what we say, our destiny is fated, however I believe that we do have control over the path we take to get there. You know life is not always about the destination. It's often about the journey. (I totally stole that from somewhere and made it my own.)

New experiences...

2006-11-14T16:54:00.000-05:00

I have always had an interest in modeling. When I was younger, I wanted to be a runway model but when I was still 5’4 as a junior in high school, I resigned myself to pursuing other interests since I am well aware that runway models need to be at least 5’9. When I went away to college, I still had an interest in modeling but more print work than runway so I joined two modeling troupes. While in the first one, JADIS, I did a photo shoot and a fashion show where I modeled lingerie and a swimsuit. It was an interesting experience that I ultimately enjoyed. While modeling with this troupe, I was told one day that I was too cute to be sexy so I resigned myself to being a cute model with “body” as one member put it.

That troupe disbanded due to administrative issues later that year so I decided to join a new troupe that was founded by some friends of mine called FACES Modeling Troupe. I did a photo shoot and a couple of fashion shows with that troupe and I learned how to walk and turn better. It was a cool experience and I carried it with me even after graduating.

Well last weekend, I did a photo shoot for the first time in almost 8 years. It was weird because I was very apprehensive being in front of the camera on the spot like that. For some reason I couldn’t get out of my head enough to enjoy something that I really enjoyed while in college. After the shoot, I thought about it and realized some other things that I could have done differently. I also spoke with someone who has also done modeling and looked at some models that look a bit more like me (not a size 2-4) and I was impressed. I was also a little excited because I feel like I can do it too. So now I want to do it again. The photographer asked me if I would be comfortable modeling in lingerie or nude. I think I can do lingerie, I may need some building before I can do nude.

It’s quite exciting trying something that will take me completely outside of my comfort zone. I’ve always been the one to play the background in things and this will allow me to play the front. Now this doesn’t mean that I want to abandon all of my current career goals to pursue a modeling career but it does mean that something I’ve always been interested in doing has become something that I can actually do. Nice.

Letting Go...

2006-09-24T11:12:00.000-04:00

I was talking to a good friend of mine and we were discussing our lives. She was seeing this one guy for a while and fairly recently she decided that it was time to walk away. She is also in the process of determining what career path will be best for her. We started talking about how we both have made decisions that involved walking away from a "comfortable situation" to pursue something we felt was best in our hearts. She made a statement about life being about having the ability to let go.

That statement struck a chord with me and I realized that letting go can sometimes be the hardest and most liberating thing a person can do. Most of the time we think about letting go and how it relates to romantic relationships and while that can be quite hard, there are some other areas where it can be harder.

One area in particular is in the job/career area. From the time we can remember, we are told that our life path should include leaving high school, going to college and finding the job that will take us into retirement. A lot of people do take that path and some of them are happy doing it. But there are others who don't find comfort in that path. I consider myself a person who took that path but with a planned detour after college. I've always wanted to be an entrepreneur so I sought out jobs that would train me for that inevitable fate.

Recently I decided to let go of my entrepreneurial ideals and take a part time job with a bank. At first I was hesitant but now that I've been in the job for a few weeks, I feel like it was a great thing to do. Now that I'm working in banking, I am gaining a skill that will always be beneficial. I have to be very detail-oriented and organized. I also have to deal with different types of people on a daily basis. All of those skills are very useful when working in entertainment. One of my biggest career goals is to have my own production company and produce films. I have already gotten the MBA (which I have heard is what a lot of producers have) so now I'm getting other skills that will help me in that role. I also decided that I can put that goal further off into the future while I continue to develop my professional and personal skills. Boy, being a grown-up is HARD!

Letting go...

It's the hardest and most liberating thing to do.

Remembering is important-Sept. 11 2001

2006-09-11T23:28:00.000-04:00

Well I really hadn't thought about writing anything today until I was browsing my myspace page and saw something that had been written by a lady that I haven't known long but I have grown to like and respect her professionally and as a person. Now although I didn't read her blog (and I probably won't), I did decide to write something here that will explain my slight indifference towards today.

See although I was born in Chicago and raised in Atlanta, I really haven't travelled as much as I would have liked during my lifetime. A city girl at heart, I've managed to stay pretty rooted to the Atlanta landscape until I found a way out...college. After escaping to college in Florida and discovering that there were indeed people who had totally different cultural experiences than me, my appetite was stirred and hasn't lightened up since.

One of my first truly career-related jobs was a gig that I landed toward the end of 2001. I was working as an Assistant Event Coordinator with Elise Communications. The cool thing about my job was that our client was Levi's and my boss was coordinating the Levi's Self-Engineered Tour. Levi's had just come out with a new type of more dressy jean called the Self-Engineered line and we were putting together a concert tour that would expose the Self-Engineered jeans to the urban market.

It was great. I was going to be traveling with the tour as the Assistant Event Coordinator. The line-up of cities was awesome. We would be hitting New York, Washington, DC, San Francisco and Atlanta. I was elated.

Well our first show was scheduled for Tuesday, September 11, 2001 in New York City at BBQ's in Times Square. We flew up a couple of days before to get everything ready for the artists and other personalities that would be participating in the tour. I instantly loved New York but I definitely felt like a fish out of water. It was ok because everyone I was with was really nice and helpful.

I can still remember it. I was getting dressed for the day. Me and the stylist for the show were about to run an errand to pick up some clothes for some of the artists to perform that night. I was watching my typical morning show, Good Morning America. I was in the bathroom doing my hair when I heard Charlie and Diane make a remark about an explosion at the World Trade Center. They were very confused as to what had happened. Then the report switched to the regular newscast. By this time, I was sitting on my bed eyes glued to the screen. The anchors on the ABC affiliate in New York at that time were talking about what had happened and someone called in. Once the first explosion had occured at the World Trade Center, there were cameras honed in on the towers and the second plane had been videotaped going into the second tower. There was a feeling of disbelief as the anchors played back the footage and saw that a plane had indeed crashed into the tower. That's when the calls started coming in more and more. People who lived near the towers had been going about their morning routines and had seen the plans fly past their windows, way too low to the ground. That's when all hell broke loose.

Fortunately I was able to reach my mom before the phones got really tied up and she knew that I was ok but that was one of the loneliest times in my life. Here I was in this strange, new city with no family and virtual strangers. I had one high school friend who was in the area, but I couldn't reach him because of the phone issue. I knew that my location in Times Square didn't put me in immediate danger with the towers but no one really knew what the hell was going on. I went outside later and Times Square was quiet as everyone looked up at the big TV screen.

I was very fortunate because I didn't lose anyone close to me and I was able to get back home to Atlanta (we got out that Thursday) safely but that day really stuck with me. I have a bad habit of holding things in and not addressing them and to this day I couldn't tell you how I feel about that day. I never really dealt with it because I didn't know how. I had a first hand account of one of our countries biggest disasters of my time. This kind of stuff only happened on TV shows and overseas, not here. I still haven't processed it, which is why I don't watch the ceremonies or read things that other people have written about it. I'm working on it though. I suppose I may need to go see someone to really deal with everything but I haven't as of yet. I guess my first step is in acknowledging that I haven't dealt with it.

My heart, prayers and good wishes still go out to anyone who lost someone in that horrible tragedy. It was a lot of unecessary heartache and loss that only served as a launchpad for this war of atrition in Iraq, which has led to additional heartache and loss.

Thanks for letting me share.

Beyonce's Bday

2006-09-05T15:39:00.000-04:00

Well ladies and gents, I have a not-so-secret secret. I am a fan of Beyonce. I've always been a fan of hers and Destiny's Child. I was glued to the screen when the group split up and then decided to replace the two fallen members. I watched that "Say My Name" video to see who the two new chicks were. I paid close attention to Michelle as she became a true member of the group once the other girl, Farrah dropped off. And yes, I know all of their names. Now that Beyonce has stepped out on her own, I remain a fan of hers as well. I was truly disappointed in the showing that Kelly and Michelle made with their own solo albums but it tickles me to see Kelly doing her acting thang so I will support her through the cinema.

Well I say all of this to say that I went out and bought Beyonce's sophomore album, Bday today. I was driving around running some errands and I remembered that today was Sept 5 and Beyonce's much awaited album would be in stores so I headed straight for the nearest Best Buy and picked it up. I must say that I was pleasantly surprised. I expected it to be a good album because I've heard a few songs from it but the whole thing was good. It was a bit short though but the 10 tracks on it are definitely ear candy. I would tell anyone to go out and pick it up. She has definitely grown up and improved on her craft. It's great to see an artist like Beyonce come out and grow and change for the better, all in the public eye.

So go out and cop Beyonce's new album. You won't be disappointed!

One of the best concerts ever!

2006-08-28T23:14:00.000-04:00

Well I went to the Mary J. Blige concert last night at Hi Fi Buys Amphitheater here in Atlanta. I must say...it was one of the best concerts I've seen ever!

I've been a Mary fan for years (it took me some time to get into her fan club but now I'm securely rooted in it) and I've never had the opportunity to make it to one of her concerts. Now I did have the great honor of seeing her and Jay-Z perform "Can't Knock the Hustle" during his Jay-Z and friends concert that was supposed to be the Jay-Z and R. Kelly concert. (I really hope I got the song name right. I suck at remembering song names). That was a GREAT performance and I love that song but it was still a very small dose of Mary. It has been really cool watching her grow and change over the years.

Last night's concert was like Mary full circle for me. Plus it was something that I really needed. It has been a long summer for me and I haven't been able to travel and really explore like I would have liked to but all of that was released last night. Mary took us all to church! She is definitely the voice of the people. Her ability to speak to her pain, triumphs, courage and faith is unbelieveable. She sounded wonderful and looked fab-u-lous!

I was transported out of my body as I swayed, sang and even teared up during the show. That was truly one of the first concerts I've ever attended where I was truly enveloped in the music. It truly led me back around to the reason why music has played such a major part in my life. Plus, Mary's music has been a big part of the back drop of my life. She sang all of my favorites plus some of my other not-so-favorite favorites. By the end of the night, I was on true sensory overload. As someone who is pretty laid back, that doesn't happen to me very often and it was a wonderful experience!

I don't know where Mary may be headed next on her tour but I would highly recommend that show to ANYONE. If you aren't a true Mary fan, you will be.

I give up...sorta

2006-08-21T20:25:00.000-04:00

Well I did it. I gave in to the "man" and got a "real" job. I now work part time for SunTrust Bank. Mind you, this is a part time gig so I can still work on building my client base in public relations and working with my current clients on the management/business consulting side. But, this new part time gig serves a few purposes.

1. It gets my mom off of my back. She can stop making sideways comments about me not working and I get out of the house every day.
2. I get benefits. Benefits for an individual are quite expensive and it really helps to be able to defer that cost. Granted, my benefits don't become active until I've been with the company for four months, but I'm ok with that. At least I can look forward to having decent insurance coverage.
3. I get stability. Although this is a part time gig, I will be making a steady (albeit not that large) paycheck twice a month. As a Taurus who needs stability, this is just what I need to get my mind off of some of my stability woes and onto making myself the millionaire I am destined to become.

With all of those things said, it was the hardest thing in the world to actually take the job but I feel a lot more proactive doing so. Now I can really push for building. I just got a new client that proves to give me a lot more leverage in the Atlanta market, which is an excellent gateway to other markets (like New York for example). I also have another potentially huge client that's on deck so keep your fingers crossed for me. If all things go well, I am poised to be in a great position by the end of this year.

I'm very excited at this new possibility before me. I'm hoping that I will be able to start traveling between Atlanta and New York on a regular basis really soon. I've decided that it doesn't make sense to move to New York until I can fully support myself in the fabulous lifestyle that I strive to ultimately achieve.

Time marches on

2006-08-17T23:41:00.000-04:00

Today I was talking to one of my close friends and she mentioned a statistic that she'd seen somewhere. Apparently once a woman reaches the age of 27, her eggs begin to lose their freshness or something like that. Now before I wrote this, I did a little digging to see if I could find some kind of medical validation to that little factoid but to no avail. Mind you, I only took maybe 10 minutes to actually research it but in that short time frame, I didn't find anything to substantiate this factoid. That doesn't mean that it doesn't exist, I just couldn't find anything.

However, my research did show me that women are born with a set amount of eggs and as time passes, that number dwindles steadily. This fact did not make things any better. Regardless of how you look at it, women are working against a clock when it comes to the desire to be a mother. Add on to that the fact that as a woman ages, it becomes more and more risky for her to carry a baby to term, I can't help but have some empathy for those women on a mission.

Physiologically it is most advantageous for women and men to procreate while we are in our mid to late 20's because that's when we are physically best able to care for a child. The funny part comes when you consider the psycological and financial ramifications of doing that. Most people that I know who are still in their 20s are not psycologically able to fathom the thought of caring for another human being that's totally dependent on them. True enough plenty of those people have already taken the plunge but I often hear horror stories of demanding schedules and no longer having a life. It just makes me want to run out and make my own baby! (sarcasm, folks)

Then there are the finances. I personally am still working on getting myself to a place where I feel totally comfortable financially. By comfortable, I mean being able to maintain a certain type of lifestyle and allow myself indulgences like travel and the occasional extravagent purchase from time to time. Many of my peers aren't at that comfortable place on their own so I can only imagine if they had kids, who can really reduce that margin of comfort if it isn't really plush. Now I'm not talking bad about those people who do decide to procreate and make little ones because being a parent is one of the hardest and most rewarding things in the world but maybe we should do more to prepare ourselves for parenthood.

As a woman in her late 20s, I am constantly being bombarded with questions about why I haven't "settled down to start a family". And now there are medical facts out there to further substantiate the questioning. I refuse to give in to the pressure. Aside from the fact that I refuse to just settle for any man and become a veritable breeder of little humans, I am by no means ready to take on that responsibility. I shouldn't be judged because I'm not ready either. Besides since my eggs are in such short supply, I should really be selective about who I decide to let sperminate them. My eggs are a precious commodity and should be handled with care with no outside influence.

When do you give up?

2006-08-13T22:22:00.000-04:00

I tend to make it a point to surround myself with people that are sincere and real within their own skin. I think that everyone should focus on surrounding themselves by people who are supportive and genuinely care about their personal well being. I don't believe in letting people into my personal space that only seek to take and not give back. I call those people vampires. I may do a blog about that at a later time so I won't digress here.

Well over time I have worked to surround myself with people who fill me up with positivity just as much as I seek to do the same for them. Now in doing this, I tend to be really slow to let new people into my life fully. It typically takes a while before I allow someone to be close to me, especially intimately. I am a fiercely loyal person, a truly Taurean trait. When I decide that someone can be close to me, I will always have their back. Sometimes my mom says that I can be loyal to a fault and I suppose there is some truth to that.

As I have gotten older and more in tune to my own personal intuition, I am even more fiercely loyal, especially when I am drawn to someone in spite of myself (sometimes). If something tells me that this person is worth the extra effort, I have no problem putting it forth.

Right now I have someone in my life that I believe is worth the effort but in spite of all of my sincere efforts, I can't seem to properly convey that loyalty to this person. I have been a fierce supporter and loyal friend to this person but he constantly questions me at every step. I have never asked him for anything but his ability to allow himself to trust me. Now, I realize that trust comes in time, which is why I am understanding about his desire to question me at times. However, I am starting to grow weary of trying to show him that he can trust me and trust in me. I'm beginning to wonder if it will ever come to pass.

I like to believe that patience is an important virtue in life and I know that in strength lies the ability to be patient but sometimes I worry about this situation. Sometimes I get so frustrated with trying to do what my heart tells me that I wonder if it will ever end. I am waiting to see if something will tell me to walk away but it hasn't in spite of his apparent inability to see my sincerity.

I guess since I made it a point to listen more closely to my inner voice, I will continue to do what I've been doing and wait to see how things will ultimately turn out.

One of my many theories...

2006-08-12T14:53:00.000-04:00

Well since you're checking out my blogspace, I figure I can start running my theories by you. I have tons of them. I am a consummate observer of the world. As I've gotten older, I have made it a point to tune in more to my intuition and that little voice in my head. Well I've noticed a pretty common phenomenon that makes me further understand why many people think that men and women can't be "just friends".

Ok, I'm sure everyone has either had one or been one. You meet someone who's very cool. You two get along very well. This person can be only mildly attractive or out right gorgeous. The relationship may or may not start off as a romantic one but it eventually turns into a friendship.

Now initially you may think that this is cool. You met a cool person that turned into a good friend. Wrong!

What you have done is fed into a very common phenomenon. Instead of having friends, guys have "fan clubs" and ladies have "dicks in a glass". Basically what this amounts to is someone who you keep in your life that can turn into a romantic situation at any time. All it takes is for you to make the suggestion and your friend turns into more than a friend. I call them fan club members for guys because they tend to be your biggest cheerleader. All they want is for you to be happy (even if it's not with them) because they care so much. I call them dicks in a glass for women because it's like an emergency boyfriend. All you have to do is break the glass and you have a man.

Now there is nothing wrong with this type of friend but they must be recognized for what they are. They also must be recognized because if you have decided that they will never become a significant other, they will always pose and issue when you do get into a relationship with someone else. Your boyfriend/girlfriend will sense the vibe and immediately dislike the person and unfortunately you may have to decrease your interaction with this person in order to keep your relationship going in a positive direction. The problem comes when you are determined to keep this "friend" in your life despite of any other relationship you may attempt to have. Another problem is when people have multiple people in this position. If you meet someone who is cool that you don't want to date, you are not obligated to make them your friend. Some people don't need to be major fixtures in your life.

Now I have nothing against fan club members or dicks in a glass but you don't need a brood of them around you. Evaluate your male/female relationships and determine who is a true blue friend and who's a fan club/dick in a glass. Then keep those people in mind when you meet "the one" and want to have a relationship. You may have to cut them off or reduce your contact with them.

Reunited...my how time flies!

2006-07-31T17:03:00.000-04:00

This past weekend I attended my 10 year high school reunion. Time has flown so fast. I can't say that I remember my graduation like it was yesterday but it doesn't seem like it's been 10 whole years since I was just 18 years old.

It was really great seeing some of the people at the reunion. This makes me reflect on my overall high school experience. I realize that I had a really good one. Now I wasn't one of the "popular kids" but I wasn't a "reject or outkast" either. I had my share of friends and I managed to be in the band, on the drill team, a member of the track team and a cheerleader. Yeah I was an avid joiner then too. I had a good time so I was excited about attending my reunion.

For the most part, everyone looked like they were doing well (or able to hide things if they weren't) and having a good time reconnecting. The funny thing was being around certain people and seeing how they haven't changed. There was a particular group of gossipy girls who were always talking about other people and pointing out the negative in every situation. This same group of girls have now grown into a group of women who do the very same thing. It always amazes me how running into people from my past can remind me why I don't really keep in touch with those people.

Overall, my 10 year high school reunion was a pleasant experience. I would definitely attend the 20 year. It will be interesting to see how those folks age and how many more kids they have.

Weddings and Such

2006-07-24T19:27:00.000-04:00

This past weekend a good friend of mine got married. The wedding was beautiful. It started on time (promptly at 5:59 according to my watch) and was basically wrapped up by 8pm. The location was gorgeously over decorated but everything was really striking and pretty.

For the first time in my life, I felt a small pang as I watched the ceremony. I suppose this is the beginnings of my biological clock ticking. According to society and everyone else I come across, my clock has been quite slow to start moving. I still don't feel in any way ready for the whole marriage thing. I am, however, ready for a relationship.

Now don't get me wrong. I am still quite picky and although I am ready to share my life with someone, I am not willing to accept the first person that comes into my life. I've met some really nice guys who would make great boyfriends...for someone else. I refuse to settle for a "great guy" who isn't so great for me. I have met someone who can fit the bill for a potential boyfriend but as someone who has been single for years (since 1999), I still want to take things really slow.

I guess most women (people) would wonder why I am dallying when it comes to relationships, but I know that the next relationship I get into will be for keeps so I can't take it lightly. I don't plan on dealing with divorce (although I know that most people don't) so I want to do all of the prep work necessary to make sure it's right.

Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Thoughts...

2006-07-16T21:11:00.000-04:00

Ever since I graduated from college, life has been a series of revelations and "light bulb moments" (a term often said by Oprah). At one point I would get a major life revelation at least once a month. It was great! I was growing as a person and I enjoyed it. I made peace with a lot of the character traits that I had wrestled with while growing up. I became more and more comfortable with the person that I was and I settled into the idea that growing up is a constant process.

Well lately I have been feeling really stagnant. I feel like I've accomplished everything I wanted to accomplish in this time and I'm ready to move on to the next challenge. Granted, running my business and establishing myself as a public relations consultant/manager/business consultant within the entertainment community is an ongoing challenge for me right now but I feel like I've reached a plateau of sorts.

I have always had a restless spirit. I've always wanted to see, do and experience many different things. Right now my restless spirit is suffering from sensory underload. I should be out experiencing the world and all it has to offer but I'm stuck here in Atlanta feeling like I'm spinning my wheels and making very little progress. I guess this is yet another life lesson for me. I have to figure out how to jumpstart my career (and the careers of the people associated with me) and push myself into the next stage of my life.

I guess I will keep waiting and working on getting that next "light bulb moment". Wish me luck!

What do I want?

2006-06-24T09:52:00.000-04:00

He looked me in my eye with sincere curiosity and said, "What do you want?"

I had a hard time articulating exactly what I wanted. I know in my heart what I want, but for some reason the words don't come easily to me. I know that I'm not looking for a relationship but I do want him. I just want to be able to consider the future possibility and work toward getting to know more about him and where he comes from.

This is funny because right now society is telling me that I should be in "production mode". As a 28 year old woman, I am supposed to be searching for my husband and preparing myself to start making babies, getting ready to find that house in the suburbs. I'm not ready for all of that. What I am ready for is the possibility for love, unconditionally.

Now that's not very easy to find so I decided not to look for it. I figured that I would focus on myself and building my career. I figured that since I couldn't actively control love, I would just make myself open to the possibility of it and let it run it's course.

I don't know if that was the best decision because it hasn't prevented me from getting hurt but it has made me feel more comfortable with the things that I have done because I know that I'm doing them with a pure heart.

Appreciation

2006-06-22T16:06:00.000-04:00

Have you ever met someone and you were instantly drawn to them? Not necessarily in a physical, carnal way but in a more intimate way.

Well a couple of years ago I met a guy and we clicked instantly. It wasn't a romantic thing. It was a natural thing. From the moment I saw him, a beauty radiated from within him. He was going through a lot of personal turmoil but I could always see his beautiful spirit. As time went on, our relationship morphed into one that involved romance but due to life issues, we haven't been in a place where we could explore romance. We are still friends though. Sometimes it saddens me because every time I see him, his spirit radiates but he can't seem to connect with it.

I so often wish that he could see himself the way I see him, a strong, beautiful, graceful man who has this huge capability for love. I guess that's why I love him.

Letting your guard down

2006-06-12T00:11:00.000-04:00

A year and a half or so ago I fell in love for the first time. Well let me change that.

I fell completely in love with no hesitations, limitations or walls up. I have been in love before but it has always been a guarded love. I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop and it usually did. This doesn't mean that I didn't have my heart broken those times because any form of letting go makes people vulnerable but I never got to experience the pure ecstasy that comes with just letting go and loving.

Well I met a guy about two and a half years ago. Initially I thought he had the nicest smile and I'm a sucker for a guy with a nice smile. He was also fun to talk to and had goals similar to mine. Now I figured that this guy would probably be a cool friend but nothing more would happen from there. About five months later, we both realized that there was a mutual attraction between us. We also knew that we were not in a position to rush into a full fledged relationship. We agreed to spend time together and if anything changed (in terms of feelings), we would revisit the subject.

Toward the end of that year, I realized that I was falling for this guy. We connected on so many levels and some of the best times we had were when we just talked and enjoyed each other's company. I expressed my growing feelings toward him and was immediately met with resistance. I was hurt and didn't really understand why he was so immediately closed to me sharing my growing feelings with him.

Now another year and a half has passed and I am still very much in love with him but I have decided to try to refocus my energy on being open to meeting someone new. I will always hope that he will decide to fully let me into his life and heart but I hurt more each day my sentiments are not reciprocated or even acknowledged. Now you may automatically think that I am regretful of everything that has happened between us since we aren't working on building a relationship but it's actually the exact opposite.

I am so glad that I was able to meet him and freely fall in love with him. It lets me know that I was right about my capacity for love and it gives me hope that I can feel this way again. Of course, I will always have a small hope that he will call me up one day and profess his love for me along with his desire to build a relationship with me but I have to be realistic. Unfortunately he is not able to accept my unconditional capacity for loving him and I have to accept that.

Life's lessons never seem to stop.

Take me as I am

2006-06-11T17:56:00.000-04:00

Ok,
I am quite tired and worn down by people right now. Why is it that people say they want to get to know you and then get frustrated when they can't put you in a category?

It doesn't make sense to me. I'm an enigma. I've always been one. I don't fit squarely into one category or the other and I've found that many people are the same. Unfortunately those people tend to feel some sort of unrealistic pressure to squeeze themselves into the aforementioned box in order to make everyone else happy. I refuse to alter my existence simply to make someone else happy. If I'm not happy with the alteration, it doesn't make sense for me to make it.

I guess some of you may say that's an arrogant and selfish way to live life but I'm happy. My friends and family are happy with who I am. The only people who have problems with me are those who feel the need to take one aspect of my character and make that be "who I am". I guess that's what we're taught. Everyone is a "type" and if you can't typecast them and "figure them out" then you shouldn't be bothered with them. I guess it's an overall issue of control. If you think you've got someone pegged then you can control some aspect of that person because you "know what makes them tick".

Hell, I don't always even know what makes me tick and I live inside my own skin. I think that's a bit arrogant and selfish to profess to know what makes someone tick and base your actions toward that person on that "knowledge".

How important is sex?

2006-05-28T00:38:00.000-04:00

Fairly recently I decided that I would make myself available to meet someone new. Well I met a really nice guy a couple of months ago and I decided to step outside of my comfort zone and take the time to get to know him. Well he's a perfect example of the one that you can "take home to mamma". He has a good job, a house and stability. There's only one problem though.

I have no desire to jump his bones when I see him.

He's not unattractive but I don't have those strong sexual feelings toward him. I shared these thoughts with my friends and one of them thought that it might be good that I don't want to sleep with him as often as possible but I'm not so sure.

To me sex is a very important part of a romantic relationship but I wonder if I'm putting too much emphasis on it in this instance. We click pretty well in other categories so maybe the sex stuff would come later?

Is it shallow or unrealistic to want the stability, good conversation and comfort to be all wrapped around an unmistakeable physical attraction?

Desperation is not pretty...

2006-05-22T01:33:00.000-04:00

Well my career of choice is within the film, music and fashion industries. I've been drawn toward that industry ever since I was a freshman in college and despite a few attempts otherwise, that's where my heart lies. I learned early on that I would not be happy unless I was doing exactly what I wanted because then it wouldn't feel like work. The only thing that I would do in other industries is some form of event coordination or business consulting.

Recently I discovered that my calling is to use my skills and abilities to help other people succeed. I've been working in various administrative positions since I was a senior in high school which is why my company is a business consulting and management firm. I like to help people in the best way possible.

Well since I started working on my career more hardcore in the past few years, I have noticed an unsavory quality in many of my business dealings. There are a lot of people that I have had business dealings with who had a desperate quality to them. They are either desperate for money, attention, acceptance or anything else that they need outside sources for. This desperation is usually very evident and apparent and easy to exploit. I choose not to exploit it simply because I choose not to operate on that level.

Desperation...it's a very bad quality to allow yourself to possess. Everyone has hard times and rough patches in life but once you allow desperation to take over, you force yourself into a corner. Desperate people are easy to find and they allow themselves to get into compromising positions because all they see is that thing they are desperate for. Unfortunately I think it is what prevents many people from ultimately succeeding no matter how talented they may be. It's a sad thing that I've seen much more of in the entertainment industry than anywhere else. I'm sure it manifests itself in other areas but entertainment is so larger than life that it's twice as apparent.

Assumptions can be destructive

2006-05-18T00:21:00.000-04:00

Hello and welcome to my blog. I am a 28 year old living in Atlanta. I have my own management and business consulting firm and I do public relations consulting as well. I work primarily in the entertainment and fashion industries. Last weekend I graduated from grad school with my MBA. The weekend before that, I turned 28.

Life is really in a tailspin for me right now. I have been working constantly for the past three years and I'm officially burned out. My company is slowly experiencing success but it is slow and I am being taught patience in that area.

My dating life is all over the place. Up until a couple of years ago, I was totally against the idea of having a boyfriend. I'm still not out there trolling the clubs and sports bars looking for "the one" or anything but I did decide that I was open to the idea of being in a relationship again after 5 years. When I made that decision, I didn't do it out of desparation so I am still very picky when it comes to guys.

Well late last year I met this guy. He was nice looking but he looked like the typical nice guy, not the typical guy I gravitate toward. I decided to step outside my box and exchanged numbers with him anyway. As it turns out, we had TONS of things in common. It was like he was the male version of me. We could talk about everything and it was really fun spending time with him. Well after we'd been hanging out for a month or so, he disappeared.

This is a common phenomenon with me, guys disappearing. I call them my own personal Houdini's. I called him and emailed him with no response. After a couple of unreturned phone calls and no email messages, I gave up. Well in the summer I work at one of the local amphitheaters part time and he works there full time. I knew I would see him but since I had given up, I wasn't worried. Well he kept making it a point to speak to me. He even had the nerve to ask if I was going to be mad all season. I told him that I wasn't mad but that I really didn't have much to say to him.

Thanks to the miracle of myspace, he found me and sent me a message today. He wants to start up a dialogue with me. I'm not sure why he wants to talk to me especially after his unexplained disappearance before. He proceeds to tell me that he disappeared because I asked him for a status report on our situation and told him that I really liked him. He assumed that meant I was trying to lock him into a relationship.

What the hell? I was very disturbed by that assumption. Why do guys assume that every woman wants to marry him? He hadn't even shown me that he was boyfriend worthy let alone anything more serious. Goodness gracious...